A
male
age
26-29,
*ick45
writes:So I've been with my girlfriend for 6 months and I found about 2 months in she cheated with another guy and had sex. She was very drunk and doesn't remember a thing. I've talked to people that were with her that night and they all say it wasn't her fault and she really didn't mean it. I really do love her and she loves me. We talked it out and everything's been very good since that but I'm always second guessing myself and I don't no if I should stay.I really do love her. I need advice if someone could please help
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2015): Was it rape?
No?
Then she cheated. Period.
There is no room for gray areas here. Not for filing rape charges against someone, and not for excusing cheating.
A
male
reader, Garbo  +, writes (4 October 2015):
 To forgive or not is a personal decision and whichever you pick then that is the best one for you. So it really does not matter, in this circumstance, that I would, for example, dump her regardless of what people say or of her claims of innocence. But that may not work for you, so if you disagree with that than that is the correct answer for you. So if you are leaning towards forgiveness, as I sense that you are in your post, then follow your gut and evaluate if she will scapegoat cheating on alcohol again in the future, how many more times can you tolerate being cheated on, are you able to live with it, once you forgive her then can you never bring it back up...
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A
male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (4 October 2015):
 you need to tell her how it is making you feel. how it is putting doubt, mistrust in your relationship. ask her about her feelings toward you. the thing is it is creating hurt toward you. it has changed the relationship between you two, you need healing in that area. you need to let her know that her actions has created hurt and mistrust. you may need to slow down in the relationship with her and process your feelings, but let her know you love her.We are accountable for our own actions in life. she placed her self with people that was drinking first mistake. You can forgive her or break up. you only have two choices. As far as she goes it would be wise for her not to run with that crowd or at least not be out drinking with them, and not make any contact with the guy she was with. you will need to take the relationship slow, trust is gained not over night. love can keep you together, but trust is earned over time. i hope this helps.
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