A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Well i may sound like a loser to you guys but i have to make a confession....i liked a guy for almost 8 months secretly without anyone knowing. I used to catch him looking at me many times, but it lead nowhere..and now i have 15 days left, and both of us will be moving to a different university. Altogether..i don't know why i always felt that he liked me, i had this strong vibe, even my friends would tell me that he was staring at me, but he never spoke to me not even a hi.Well i really want to know him better before we leave cuz i don't want to regret it, but i don't see him these days what do i do? Plus i don't have his email ID, nor do i know his friends...what do i do?I need to talk to him before he leaves!!
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female
reader, Artistry +, writes (4 May 2008):
Hi there,
You really like this young man, and you have X amount of days, before you both leave for university. OK, so what will be accomplished in X amount of days, if you talk to him before you both leave? Do you know if he has a girfriend? He may be unavailable any way. You don't even know that if and when you would get to know him, that you would like him or that he would like you. There are so many things here, that do not seem to me to be worth your time and effort in view of the plans you both have. You are going to be at a new school, meeting new people, studying, getting involved with new adventures, what will the two of you, have to offer each other, when both of you are growing and moving forward with your lives. You will meet new boys, who will probably be more interesting, than this young man, as you will be able to get to know these new people in your life. Let this one rest, go on to university and let time take it. Who knows, when you both get back home and you see him again, your entire perspective will have changed, because you will have grown and so will he. Live your life
in the here and now, not in the what if. Let your fantasy be that, you real life adventures will be much more exciting. Trust me. Take care.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2008): No, you aren't a loser, but this is a fantasy you have only lived in your head....you say you like him but have never talked to him, or know anything about him.....this is a schoolgirl crush.
You missed your chance to get to know him, and now you don't want to be starting a long distance friendship, as it won't last as you don't have any foundation for a relationship....in fact your sense of urgency about this almost seems like you would only do it with the safety of knowing it can't really go anywhere.
There is nothing here to regret, you haven't lost anything, just an idea you have in your head that this guy likes you because he stares at you, but has never spoken to you. Unless he is completley without social skills and suffers from extreme shyness, most guys will go after what they want....and will approach you first...with a hellow or a comment or a conversation....he may even have a girlfriend and isn't interested in meeting you for that reason......
I think you are nervous about moving and you need a distraction, so this is it....if you feel you have nothing to lose, walk up to him and introduce yourself and go from there....but my take is it isn't worth you getting all worked up over as you probably will not see him again after your move.
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