A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have a problem i love my girlfriend been with her a year and we want to live together at some point. have a lot in common and she is a lovely person who i do have have feelings for but only in a frinedship way. i dont fancy her anymore. its not just sex i dont care about that but its the fact i dont even want to cuddle or kiss her. i care and love her so much i could have a future with her but i dont fancy her and dont want to share a bed hug and kiss her. i fancy another girl that i know but wont do anything about it or ask her out because im with my girlfriend and would never cheat. do i make a life with my partner who i have alot in common with treats me good and i love her but do not fancy her on any level what so ever anymore or do i end it and ask the girl out on a date who i do fancy. i know this other girl a little bit as we just started working together. she is new in other office i work at. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (20 September 2012):
 she's your friend.
this is the hardest breakup reason in the world.
but you must not live with her or lead her on
you must in fact end the relationship.
sadly she will be so heartbroken she will probably want to go NO CONTACT at least for a while so be prepared for that.
be prepared for crying, asking why, begging pleading.. etc.
you must BE STRONG and honest...
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (20 September 2012):
 You should break up with your girlfriend. There is no other alternative here. Just be gentle when you do it, and let her know that while you feel friendship for her, you feel like you want to go in a different direction.
It's good that you don't want to cheat on your girlfriend. Stay with that thought, and do the hard thing and break up with her. It will be rough. It won't be pleasant, but keep it short and don't draw it out. Resist the whole "We can still be friends" line, because you don't want to just be friends. A breakup is a clean break, because what new relationship can handle regular contact with an ex?
Don't minimize it out of guilt. Be gentle, but final.
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