A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years and our relationship is great. We've been through so many problems before and now he said he wants to marry me soon.Problem is, we come from totally different background. Our lifestyle and environment is again so different. My family is wealthy. I help my parent business and its so well organized that easier and practical our life.While, his parents run traditional restaurant which need to work 12 hour a day and they do it manually which require physical strength and energy so much. He's now working in a company and plan to learn experience from that and going to open the same business ( start from small business first ). He now own his own car which is cheapest car but with his own money. He said if we are married, we will live in his current house where there are so crowded as his workers live in there ( his parents 2, plus worker 10 ). His house is not a big house. I can say it is so crowded. He said he still can't afford to buy his own house for us. My parent actually like his personality, he's diligent and mature. Otherwise I know my mom is worrying about my future with him and sometimes underestimate him. She thinks that he's not going to give me a happy life and only make my life hard.I don't know what should I do. Honestly I don't want to live in with his family and crowded house after we marry. I also don't want to live that hard. But I love him and I feel I'm stuck and can't meet anyone else. I'm 25 and asian. In our tradition its old enough to get marry and its hard to find another soulmate in this age.
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (7 January 2014):
 If I'm not mistaken you posted a very similar question not too long ago, but in that one you mentioned your boyfriend had cheated on you and you were still concerned about that. Was that you?
Given the different backgrounds and the fact that he has cheated on you I say hold off marrying him. Save up whatever money you can for your own future and see what happens. Even if you do marry him, you don't have to live in his family's home. You can insist (before hand) that you live with your family or on your own.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2014): Oo sweetie your still a baby .. 25 isn't old I'm 38 haha and still not past it not yet anyway lol .. Why can't he live with your folks after marriage or is it tradition that you stay with your husbands ??Now life is not about easy choices .. Life is never easy .. And it's good that your man wants to work hard and set up his own business .. But with that does come lots of work from you both as marriage is team work .. You can't just be with him because it's convient that isn't right .. I know you love him too .. But I do get the at my age statement ..I think it's time to have a heart to heart with your future man maybe to be.. If you want to stay with mum n dad get mum n dad to help rent you a place for say the first year if they would do this ?? There are other choices if you want to be together or he builds his business has money for a home and then you marry say at 30 .. That isn't old .. If however this is a deal breaker best end sooner than later ..Wish you both much happiness sweetie
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