A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Theres this guy ive been seeing for umm maybe 4 months or so.We started having a sexual relationship after a few dates.I know,dumb on my part.He seemed interested in more than sex,and still does seem to be.Sometimes we just go out and do things together,no sex involved.The thing is,we arent advancing into any type of commited relationship.I think thats its been enough time for him to have taken it to that level if he wanted to,and he hasnt shown any interest in doing so.He seems to just enjoy my company,along with the occasional romp in the hay.So anyways! Id really like to stop having sex with him,because its making me feel badly about myself.I dont like where things are going,and I constantly tell myself its not right to be having sex with him, over and over,in a non commited relationship.I feel slutty to be quite honest,and thats not who I am.But how do you stop having sex,after youve already done it quite a few times?Im not trying to just not talk to him or go out with him again.All in all he is a nice,gentleman type of guy and has given me no reason to dislike him.I just dont want to be so physical if we arent commited.How can I tell him this? Im not sure how to say it,since it is kind of a strange thing to tell somebody.Unless you DONT want to talk to them anymore.Help? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (29 April 2009):
 There are a couple of ways of looking at this. Your present relationship seems OK except you have started feeling guilty. Sex shouldn't be something you hand out to guys like sweets to draw them into a relationship later. That's dishonest. However it's your life, your body and your decision. If you don't want sex any more with him - end of story. Just try to be honest about it. He may take it better than you imagine.
A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (29 April 2009):
 Tell him that you want more than a FWB relationship, he sounds like hes just in for the occassional company and sex. So tell him that since you are not in a committed relationship with him, you will no longer be having sex with him. Be strong and since it is your body, you call the shots!!
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