A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: HiI have major trust issues in my relationships due to a previous disappointing relationship. My ex and I are still friends and I really don't know why I want to keep the friendship since he was very horrid towards me. I have met someone wonderful (I think) but am so scared to start loving him so I keep my ex around as a barrier which stops me from loving my new guy. I am confused and so scared. I know I should walk away from the old disasterous relationship but what if I get disappointed again.Thanks for the help.Very confused.
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female
reader, Basschick +, writes (2 August 2007):
Number one, why are you still hanging onto old baggage that doesn't bring you an ounce of happiness? Dump the ex as your "friend". If you like this new guy, take it slow. It's going to take time to build up trust and feel good again because you've been carrying the dead-weight of your ex around your neck for far too long. People always have difficulty moving on when they try to remain friends with an ex. You probably would've been in a much better place a long time ago had you taken these steps early on. But it's not too late. Don't give up on the chance to be happy with someone you really can trust. Good luck!
A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (2 August 2007):
Please don't stop letting other guys getting close to you, cos one guy has hurt you. Not all guys are like that, trust me. Why are you using your ex as a stop gap until another guy comes along, this guy has treated you appallingly. Personally myself I would not have anything to do with your ex, because it only stops you from concentrating on building any foundations with the next potential boyfriend which could destroy your future with them. Start afresh with this new guy and get rid of any oldghosts so to speak that are lurking around. Good luck hun.
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