A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 21 years old, and have never had a girlfriend. I grew up in literally the middle of nowhere, with nobody my own age within miles of me - the closest was my brother, 5 years my junior. I had very little contact with other kids due to this, and rarely got to socialize outside of school. The schools I attended were both all-boys schools, so I had little to no contact with women at all until the point I started college a couple of years ago. Even then, while I found I was able to make friends with a couple of girls, I didn't find any of them attractive or anything, and never gave it a second thought, and never felt ashamed or embarrassed that I was single and had yet to be in a relationship while others my age were in very sexually active relationships.I've recently managed to start getting out into the world a little bit more, having now finally managed to work up the money to buy my own car, and no longer having to rely on my parents for transport. I noticed a woman a couple of months ago who I found extremely attractive - something that hasn't happened in my life before. Since then, I've seen her around fairly regularly at one of the spots where I tend to hang out with friends. I want to talk to her and introduce myself to her, but I have no idea how to break down that barrier and just start a conversation with someone who I'm very attracted to. I've always been a fairly shy and quiet person and found it hard to interact with new people, so naturally, I'm really feeling stressed over introducing myself to someone I find so appealing. I'm fairly confident that when I DO break through that awkward first step I'll be able to find a way to keep a conversation going (especially if she likes talking about herself!), and I think that I'm a fairly decent looking guy, I just have no idea how to approach a woman that I'm attracted to. I'm worried that I'm going to come across creepy, awkwardly, or be too obvious. Is there any advice that anyone can give me on how to take that first step towards initiating a conversation in this situation? Any input is much appreciated.-P
View related questions:
acne, money, never had a girlfriend, shy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, llifton  +, writes (13 July 2011):
 no matter what you do, do it with CONFIDENCE. confidence is key. but there's a fine line between confident and arrogant. make sure you don't come across as an arrogant ass.
i've always found making people laugh loosens them up really quickly. see if you can't find some sort of witty or goofy thing to say to initially get her laughing. then use that as a means to tell her something like "hey, i've noticed you here a bunch but we've never formally met.. i'm (insert name here). what's your name?" see if you can't get her talking.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2011): Start with what you have in common. You've already said you see her in the same place every time. What kind of spot is it? What do you do there? To approach her just ask her for something trivial like: do you have a pen I can borrow? Is this sit taken? If she is with a friend ask: Are you two sisters/related? Then tell them your name and ask for theirs. Keep it simple. It doesn't have to be so complicated.
...............................
|
