A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my problem is that i have severe dating anxiety. this is the reason i run out on most guys after the second date. a few days ago i met this really nice guy and he wants to take me out this thursday. i said yes but now the anxiety has kicked in. im experiencing vomitting, naseau, loss of appetite, heart palpitations, diarrhea, and loss of sleep. this whole this is getting ridiculous. i want to be able to sit down for a date and acually be able to eat. a big part of this anxiety stems from the fact that im 21 and have never been kissed. but anyways, im really stressed out and any advice on how to handle this would be really nice. if you know how to control these symptoms that would be nice too. thanks! Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, natasia  +, writes (11 October 2010):
 ps
go and have dinner with him because ... the sooner you get a boyfriend, the sooner you won't have to go on any more dates!! Simple! : )
A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (11 October 2010):
Control of symptoms: have a big glass of wine before you go out : )
No, seriously - you need to get perspective and calm yourself enough to enjoy yourself.
But I know with these anxieties that what you really, really need is for a guy to see how nervous you are, make you feel better, and kiss you at last. Being kissed and held will be the best cure for this.
So force yourself on the date, however bad you feel, and have faith that it will be worth it in the end, and in a few years time just lying next to your husband will seem like the most ordinary thing on the planet. And you won't have to go on any more dates : )
Dates are awful, I think - just the word 'date' makes me shiver. It's all so planned. Don't think of it as a date - think of it as hanging out with a nice guy. And I think that if you really like him, you should TELL him about your nervousness. He will help you, I'm sure.
GO AND HAVE DINNER WITH HIM! Do it! You can! : )
...............................
A
female
reader, Thorn, +, writes (11 October 2010):
Firstly you need to take nice slow deep breaths - you shouldnt be worried because this guy is interested in you, he wants to take you out and get to know you so give him that chance.
From the sounds of it this is not just an anxiety but a fear of dating - you need to ask yourself what are you actually fearing when it comes to these dates?
You also shouldnt dwell on the fact that you havent been kissed there is nothing wrong with this - you just need to start believing in yourself and show yourself that you can do this just make sure your the one in control.
Apples and bananas are good for sickness and naseau
warm milk for a better night sleep
i hope this helps
...............................
A
female
reader, [?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] +, writes (11 October 2010):
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png) Calm down dear, take a deep breath and chill.. Take it easy, if he is a good man than there is no reason to panic. On dates you are supposed to eat, so why would it bother him if you did? It wouldn't be normal if you didn't. Trust me, I'm 15 and I get nervous about hanging out with guys. Since, I lack of confidence, but you have to keep your mind off those subjects. You'll eventually look back and realize they didn't even matter. As for the never been kissed part, that isn't nothing. You will have your moment, everybody goes through this at a different pace. We're all different, you can't cure anxiety; relaxation, being postitive, and taking time is key.
...............................
|
