A
female
age
30-35,
*eogurl
writes:I still really need some help. Things have gotten to the point were all i do is cry. I just feel so lost and alone even though i have friends and family around. How ever i have not been able to talk to any of them. Not even my boyfriend as i feel as though i am constantly being judged.This is the link to my original question.http://www.dearcupid.org/question/with-all-this-going-on-im-depressed-and.htmlPlease help.Thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, geogurl +, writes (19 April 2007):
geogurl is verified as being by the original poster of the question Yer sometimes they are puffy and huge, but family and my boyfriend don't notice because my parents work all the time and are rarely around when i'm home and my boyfriend isn't always around when i cry and when he is i try and force my self not to which doesn't always work. So i guess he knows some of the stuff which is going wrong as i do tell him some things but not much
A
female
reader, chachacha +, writes (19 April 2007):
If you cry for 6 hours without stopping at all, your eyes must be hugely puffy and red and you must be dehydrated.
How come your family, friends, and boyfriend don't notice?
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A
female
reader, geogurl +, writes (18 April 2007):
geogurl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your help and i am going to try and talk to somebody about it. But right now as you say i am just really down.
As a response to the first answer i have cried for a straight 6 hours today as i do most days with other more minor eppisodes of crying throughout my day. I even cry my self to sleep every night.
Also the reasons i gave on my other post are why i feel so blue. I also now understand that this isn't going to go away as i kept telling myself it would. (It has now gone on for many months). I first thought it was because of all the stress of school but there is no stress anymore and the problem is getting worse.
So yes i will be seeking advice from a school councelor.
Thanks again
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A
female
reader, mexico36 +, writes (18 April 2007):
I was saddened when I read your email. I know exactly how you feel as i felt like you when I was a teenager and couldnt work out why; my home life was fine but I always felt very lonely and would cry for no apparent reason. It is only now i'm older (36) that I realised I was suffering from depression as I have suffered it on and off since being a teenager and sometimes its been pretty unbearable. I really hope you find some help - as the lady before says - it wont just go away on its own, these are real signs of depression. Good luck
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A
female
reader, mexico36 +, writes (18 April 2007):
I was saddened when I read your email. I know exactly how you feel as Ii felt like you when I was a teenager and couldnt work out why; my home life was fine but I always felt very lonely and would cry for no apparent reason. It is only now i'm older (36) that I realised I was suffering from depression as I have suffered it on and off since being a teenager and some times its been pretty unbearable. I really hope you find some help - as the lady before says - it wont just go away on its own, these are real signs of depression. Good luck
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A
male
reader, Dr. Mark  +, writes (18 April 2007):
Hi there...
You are not alone. Teenage years are supposed to be "the best years of your life", but in reality, at these years between being a kid and becoming an independent adult, there can be ups and downs, and sometimes the downs feel pretty deep down. If it is a short time issue, well, it can happen to all of us, but if it begins to last for long periods of time, then it might be a good idea to talk to a professional about it. Two good people to start with are your family doctor, and a guidance counsellor at school.
Sometimes for mild cases of feeling down, you can make a decision to just not feel that way anymore. It's true that sometimes when you smile, the very act of smiling can lift your spirits. You can say, "Why would I feel like that, when I can feel happy like this? I'm going to start feeling happy now!".
Physical activity can help. Sometimes feeling down in the dumps, it can be really difficult to get motivated to exercise, but if you can FORCE yourself to go for a run and get your heart pumping, it can release chemicals in your brain that gives you a good mood boost. You hate to do it at first, but are glad when it's done.
Can you think of any reasons why you feel blue? If there is something specific, can you think of something you can do to change these things?
Remember, everybody hurts sometimes.
I hope you might find this at least somewhat helpful!
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A
female
reader, chachacha +, writes (18 April 2007):
You don't cry ALL the time, do you? There are some times when you are not actually crying, aren't there? You don't cry non stop for 24 hours a day?
So that tells me that you are in a mood where you are telling yourself that you "cry all the time" when what you probably mean is "you cry quite a few times during a day, for maybe a few minutes each time". That is quite different.
What this tells you is that your thinking is distorted - you are imagining that things are worse than they are.
Another example of this is that you feel as if you are "constantly being judged". You'll find that your boyfriend and friends have other things to think about than constantly judging you - you are not the centre of their world, they are. It is your distorted thinking that makes you feel that everyone around you is just there to judge you. They have their own lives to lead. And even if they are judging you, so what?
We are each and everyone of us "alone", even when we have friends, family and a loved one. It may be worth seeing a counsellor to understand more about this - your doctor should be able to recommend you one.
But even when we are alone, no problem cannot be discussed with loving friends and family, and if you feel you cannot discuss your problem, then there is something inside you which doesn't really want help. Just try it... what harm can it do? Can you feel worse than you do now? Don't you think they want to know that you're unhappy and help you out?
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A
female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (18 April 2007):
 You need help. Now. You are suffering from depression and that is not something that is going to get better all by itself. I suffered depression when I was your age and it took me years to get past it. I know exactly how it feels. You need to be able to talk to a councelor or phychiatrist. Your parents should be able to set you up an appointment. If you dont feel confortable asking your parents for help, try the school councilor. Dont ignore this and let it get too far, like I did.
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