A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:why are somepeople so confident and seem to think they are on top of the world. while others seem not to think they are great at all. sometimes i see people who are the former, but if you look at what they do and how they live it is hard to know. I work with this guy who bignotes himself on the phone to all who will listen. He's always behind with his work. He blames everyone if something goes wrong. His wife is the boss in charge. he is teflon coated and lazy.I get in to work. Sit down, start work, work hard all day. OK I admit I am not good at net working. But I'm not good at parties and talking to others anyway. But I get more work heaped on my desk than anyone. And miles more than him. Yes I know the boss is his wife. so he can get away with anything. he walks out in the middle of the day to get his hair cut. none of us would dare (not want to either) not be so stupid.If something goes well he takes full credit for it, even if he did nothing. Maybe you will say get another job. but it is not easy to do that. But sometimes it seems so unfair. the business belonged to his wife's family and she inherited it. but she is very efficient in getting what she wants. And she is very well accepted by the customers which is good. Buy sometimes the little bunnies who do all the work while he swans around like the king hurts morale. Can anyone suggest ideas of how I could stop feeling so put upon? Or maybe I just have to put up with it.I might add that he speaks to women with innuendo in all his remarks. But at least his wandering hands have stopped since one girl make a huge lot of trouble (for herself) for complaining about his wandering hands. the boss in public refused to believe it. But at least that stopped happening.
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (12 February 2011):
 Be polite to this guy. I wonder if his wife keeps him on the payroll, just so she can keep an eye on her wandering hands husband.
Document all you do, even if it's a log of every task. Just so it's obvious that you carry a big load.
Eg:
Date /your name/ client worked on
Suggest a big writeable wall board,
Where people can say where they, for how long. Position it so his wife can see it. Bet he does not use it, but at least it will make it more obvious.
Such as:
Date/ name / out where/reason / time expected back
When you get back you can rub it out.
Surely his wife will see that he's not got the courtes
If you don't already, suggest, in writing to the boss that you keep a record of any client thank you letter. If you have any sort of staff letter (if not suggest, in writing) that such a site would give staff a boost)
Pretty soon the boss will see that you are an ideas key employees.
You sound efficient too, otherwise so much work would not be landing on your desk,
A
male
reader, Sav  +, writes (12 February 2011):
Hi, this sounds like a bit of a tricky one because you don't want to rock the boat but you cant stand it any longer.My advice would be to spend a month - I know it seems like a long time but its not really - and note down every instance that is unacceptable. Note down the haircuts, the behind with work, the unprofessional telephone manner - dates and times and have someone witness it for you.Then at the end of the month re-evaluate your findings, is it that bad? is it something you can let slide or is it something that needs dealt with more seriously.If it is something that needs dealt with - take a look online for a local employment help group - usually there are groups that are free to use and they can give you some great advice on employment law and rules and regulations in your filed of work - you can check these against what is happening in your workplace and see if its possible to have some form of external audit/evaluation. This can usually be achieved annonymously.orIf your employer has a superior, write down your findings in a letter and approach them with it, but have support/witness from a colleague. In the UK this is known as filing a grievance - check your local employment law and your contract for details of this.orAsk colleagues if they feel the same - organise a staff meeting and bring this issue up directly with him in front of the other staff who are prepared to back you up - safety in numbers !Hope that helps in some way - good luck !
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