A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My best friend, Danny, has a sister, Lisa, that is nine years younger than us. Danny and I turn 30 years old in March and April and Lisa is 21 years old. I been knowing Lisa since she was 8 years old so I got to watch her grow up and I always consider her as a little sister. The problem is I had a sex dream about her last night. I feel guilty that I had a sex dream about my best friend's sister and a girl who I always consider as one of my little sisters. Why would I have a sex dream about her out of all people? Should I feel guilty for having a sex dream about her? Is there anyway I can stop from having a sex dream about her?
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 March 2019):
It happens.
And there really isn't much you can do. It's like when you have a dream about someone you care about who (in your dreams) did something awful and you wake up PISSED OFF at them. THEY didn't do squat! You know this but you are still MAD!
A dream is ONE thing, another would be to PURSUE this dream - as in you trying to have sex with this young woman.
While I totally get that it feel "disturbing" to have someone in your dreams in a way you didn't expect.
Usually, when having sexual dreams it's LESS about the person you dream about and more a statement of the state of YOUR libido. So how is your sex life? Not really having a meaningful sex life?
It doesn't mean you are a horn-dog who can't control himself around the little sister of a friend. It just means that for whatever reason... you HORNY brain picked her out for a dream partner. Because she is a female. It could have been the check out girl at your local supermarket or the old lady at the post office.
Relax.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2019): You can't control what you dream. Dreams are subconscious mind-activity; and don't have much, if anything, to do with reality.
You can control your behavior around Lisa; and consciously keep things in proper perspective.
Guilt should only be felt for what you've done wrong in the realm of reality. You're being a little melodramatic. Lisa isn't 8 anymore! She's 21! Unless your dreams were about having sex with 8 year-old Lisa; there's nothing to be ashamed of.
Your subconscious-mind is just setting it's own boundaries by conjuring-up a little guilt; and offering the subliminal suggestion that maybe Lisa is too young for you. Control your urges and impulses; if you're checking her out a little more than necessary.
If you're in-denial about harboring lustful feelings about Lisa; then remind yourself over and over that she's like a little sister to you. If you can't, keep your visits short and sweet when she's around.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2019): Dreams are beyond your control. They are just your imagination flexing it's muscles free from the conscious minds want to restrict it with social conventions and morality. Lots of people have sex dreams about their actual family, so count yourself lucky.
You can't control it. So you shouldn't feel guilty. No one in fact should feel guilty for any thought they have, awake or asleep. Your actions are what define you- these are all of your thoughts good and bad distilled into how you behave. It is this you are judged upon. Don't be so hard on yourself.
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