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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi,I had a booty call(Mike) for the past 2 years.I met his friend at a party and his friend(Todd) started coming on to me,i wasnt really interested but he calls me 2 days later.My bootycall(mike) gave him my number,Todd offered me a part time job with him.We worked 1 day a week at night and on the 3rd time we slept together after he dropped me home.We have been sleeping together every tuesday after work,he asked me not to sleep with Mike anymore(saying Mike is a real bad guy).I agreeded but every tuseday he runs out my apartment after sex to meet his girlfriend (i know i am wrong to sleep with this guy). My question is I have a real boyfriend now and cut off all bootycalls but Todd told me please dont leave that he loves me!..I am shocked,He always did act jealous of other guys and called me everyday but why the "I love you" now after I get a boyfriend and stopped his bootycalls?
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male
reader, Yos  +, writes (30 May 2006):
 I'm glad you found the replies useful. Yes, guys are vulnerable to falling in love too (despite our pretending otherwise). Personally I don't do booty-calls as I just can't separate sex and love. It's not fair on the other person, and not really fun for me either. Good luck with the new man :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2006): Thanks Yos and Irish49 for your replies. Yos you are right he started getting jealous more and more as we slept and worked together,then him calling me eveyday was also strange for me. When i told him I met a new guy(now my current boyfriend that i love) at a family function who lives 3 hours away he said back then it wasnt worth traveling 3 hours to see a guy you dont real know(thank god I didnt listen to him and I almost did). It funny but reading the answers reminded me of 4 of my girlfriends who had bootycalls and the guys all got serious where the girls only saw it as fun,I didnt see I was in the same boat.Yos ,you are right some feelings will develop on one side even if you think it is just casual sex. Funny how the guys seem to be the ones who fall in love with the bootycall girl.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2006): You have to decide what you want more out of relationships. Todd had sex with you and now he 'claims' he's in love with you or...is he trying to keep you just where he wants you. As a 'no-strings' sex partner, willing and ready at his beck and call. Some guys will say they 'love a girl' only because they have a sexual interest in them. So start afresh, dump Todd and go and establish a real, solid, committed relationship with your bf and make all these 'bootycalls' a thing of the past. I am pleased to see that you are adjusting your dating methods, here. Just remember hun...have sex when you are in a relationship with someone who loves you, is devoted to you and committed, one who cares for you, and one who will appreciate the wonderful gift of your body and emotions. Good luck, hun
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A
male
reader, Yos +, writes (30 May 2006):
Because a 'booty call' rarely stays just a 'booty call', at least for one person involved. Despite the (currently) popular idea that we can have casual sex without becoming emotionally engaged, the reality is usually not like that. It sounds like some time during your booty-calling he fell for you. Which is very normal and natural.
Given the fact you have a real boyfriend now, I'd recommend keeping him, and putting Todd out of your mind, before you get into an even more complex situation.
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