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female
,
anonymous
writes: Hi,I'm 28 and have been living with my boyfriend for 2 years. We love each other a lot and have our ups and downs but work hard to iron things out. During the holidays, I went to visit my family, got a sick feeling in my stomach, checked his email and found that he had contacted escort services. I checked his cellphone and atm statement and saw he took out $500 while making escort calls. When I confronted him about this, he volunteered the information that he had made calls and was considering doing this, but he didn't go through with it. I feel terrible, I don't know whether to believe him or not, so I left a few days ago. any advice would be appreciated, thanks
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2006): Does it matter? He already told you he was considering getting an "escort." Why are you still with this guy? Do I have to spell it out for you? R-U-N!!!
A
male
reader, Mr.Ed +, writes (17 January 2006):
 The real question is wether or not you believe him in his answer. You said he volunteered the information; sounds like he willingly admitted it. Had he have lied about it or denied it; wouldn't that make him untrustworthy. Then I think you couldn't stay with a liar. Based upon your statement that he didn't go through with it; I would have to say that he sounded honest about his intentions.
Still leaves the question about what happened to the 500.00 dollars doesn't it. If he successfully answered that then I don't think you should be too worried. Lot's of people have fantasies and some even act upon them; those who act need to be curbsided; those who don't need to be held.
Obviously there is something wrong with your relationship period. You checked HIS e-mail showing that you didn't trust him anyway. He isn't happy with something sexual or else he wouldn't have thought about an escort service. I suggest that the two of you sit down and have a heart to heart talk about YOUR needs and HIS. Communication will lead you down the right path of break-up or marraige. Trust from both of you comes from communication not from spying and not telling you everything he needs or wants. Before you break it off for good, try listening to what he has to say; you have nothing to lose.
Good luck.
Ed
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