A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been in my first serious relationship for the past 4 years. I started dating the guy with I just turned 16. I had never been sexually active until him and to this day I am 19 and have still only had one partner, but I later found out some things from him. After about 2 years and a couple of months I found out he cheated on me a couple of times. I knew when I got with him though, he was a little into drugs and he had cheated on every other girl he had been with. Stupid me thought I would be the girl to change his mind. When I had turned 18 we got our first apartment together and I believe a little bit after my 18th birthday we broke up. During our break up we were talking things out and he told me about a few people he cheated on me with. I was shocked and didn't know what to do or to think. We talked got back together later (that was the first time we ever broke up) and now about 4 years down the road he has made a full recovery, but I don't think I have. Personally I am still having trust issues, wondering if I am really happy, if it might be too late for us, and maybe I have fallen out of love with him. Sometimes I think that I am with him still because I don't want to leave him alone, or because it's comfortable and I don't have to be afraid of rejection. I think I am falling out of love with him, or already have. I don't know. I need help, but I don't even think I have asked a question yet.
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