A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:hello im gay but my partner j has seem to gone of me ?she does not wont sex anymore or even tenderness?what help or advise may you be able to give me?i feel we are more like friend than lovers.iv tried being romantic but that doesnt work.she told me she does not wont sex anymore i asked if it was me she said no its her the way she feels .iv tried to be understanding but its nearly a year and im finding thats its getting harder to ignore.i love her very much j say she loves me to i dont know.please help me thanks k Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2007): HiI had the same problem in my relationship (i'm gay too).I tried the romantic tact amoungst many other things and was turned down on many many occasions, which knocked my ego and made me self counsious. We have been together 9 nearly ten years now and we talk our problems through and without sounding condecending this is what you must do. Tell her how you feel she may feel that it is too late to do anything about it or she may feel that her confidence has been knocked. My partner was secretly devestated that she lost her sex drive and it was only through talking to each other about how we felt that i found out she was really upset about it and felt like a failure, she was also scared that i would leave her because of it. She eventually went to see her doctor who discovered that she had a hormonal imbalance + she was going through an early menopause. Although we do occasionally have sex now it's still nowhere near the amount we used to enjoy. Try starting with cuddles and kisses these can give you alot of pleasure but let her know it will not lead to sex and take it from there. Anyway i just though i'd let you know your not on your own, take time to really talk it through, and dont let awkwardness and shyness get in the way both of you need to be 100% honest to each other on where you think your relationship is going. Best of luck
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