A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I feel like I'm back to competing with other women for the man I'mdeeply in love with. It's so physical, my heart feels like it's constantly breaking, and then healing when I see him, and then hurting again.We were great once, but then he moved away from the relationship because he wasn't ready to commit further. Maybe I wasn't either, despite my feelings. Now I think we might have a chance if we could just get unconfused. I've realized that compatibility is the answer rather than compromise, and I want to encourage this perpetual bachelor. Please does anyone have any advice how to go slowly enough to deepen things, yet not strangled by competing others who vie for his attention?Help!!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2008): I, the original writer of the question, want to thank you all for answering so well! You've really given me a boost, and it is helping me already, to take a
positive stance and have faith!!!
THANKS SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2008): Hi Hunny,
Oh you sound so sad and you want this to work so bad well Ill try to help if I can, I have been married 3 times unfortunatlly 2 of which were very abusive the latter of the two very bad he wouldnt let me have any friends. I have many friends now and im in a great relationship both me and my partner have friends of the opposite sex. It is hard to share your man at times but trust is the most important thing hunny, I learnt to be kind to myself first as I used to beat myself up because of my failed marriages but it wasnt me I no that now, Always be kind to you... Love yourself for the beautiful person you are and when you feel the faith in you, you will feel the love and faith in this relationship I do hope things work out for you sweetheart and you find the happiness you so deserve WITH LOVE N HUGS MANDY xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, rockelle +, writes (16 January 2008):
 My advice to you is just enjoy the time that you spend with him. If it is meant to be it will happen. If it doesn't fit do not try and force it.Competition can sometimes be a good thing, it may make him appreciate and enjoy you even more after a few bad dates. Just be cautious and keep in mind that he may never want to settle down but there are no guarantees in any relationship so I think it is worth a try.
Good Luck
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (16 January 2008):
 Be casual when you are with him, laugh alot, be positive. If he feels comfortable around you and has a great time he will want more. What ever you do, don't come across as needy or desperate. But also be prepared to find out that he is indeed a perpetual bachelor and may never want to commit to a relationship. In that case you may want to move on.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (16 January 2008):
 Get back into his main stream. Talk to him , get involved with activities together . Good luck.
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