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anonymous
writes: Me and my girlfriend have being going out for 8 months. I'm head over heels in love with her and she has just went away to Greece and for some reason I keep thinking of things that happened early in the realtionship and feeling guilty. E.g. to me my girlfriend is pretty, but one of my mates said she wasn't and coming from an all boys school I seen the grief you can get and I used to worry what my mates might think of her after that. Aand when at uni she just doesn't care how she looks and stuff (which I like about her) and if I was meeting I would be worried if my friends were around because I wanted them to see her when she looks her best. It doesn't bother me now though. Also there was a time when a girl who I have no interest in, but who really likes me, purposely exposed her cleavage to me on a webcam and I just thought that was really stupid but for a laugh I tried to persuade her if she would flash because I thought she might be that desperate to try it on with me. She didn't however and I wasn't that bothered really. But I feel guilty for that. Am I right to feel this bad or am I crazy? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2005): I didnt ask her to expose her cleavage, she just did it to try and flirt with me i would never ask her to do that. She told me to accept her invitation of a webcam "to see if it worked" and then she put it on her cleavage on purpose. I tohught it was funny that she would try this and then i just went on to see if she would flash for the banter. Am only 19 by the way and I think any 19 year old would have done the same. I dont like the girl who done it and i dont find her attractive. i just find her annoying and needy and I wanted to see if she would be sad enough to go that far as she really liked me. As for the other thing a think i over-exagerated, i would get a worrying thought crossing my mind but that was it, if my friends did actually see her i wouldnt be bothered and havnt being on the many occasions in which they have seen her around university. Am just a worrier and i always have being - i even worry that she might fancy one of my mates if she sees them, thats how stupid i am. I do love her to bits and thats why i feel bad, for these little things.
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reader, D_Missy +, writes (23 June 2005):
I think the flashing thing is forgivable enough. It was stupid, nothing happens, and its okay to have fun. No one was hurt. Even though you still feel guilty about the whole 'how she looks thing', you already said it doesn't bother you anymore. You've gotten over it. Feeling guilty about the past won't help anything. Just be happy with the way you are now. :)
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reader, dear caroline +, writes (22 June 2005):
you need to stop flirting! and you have been flirting bacause thats what you are feeling guilty about, if you were so worried or concerned for your g/f feelings then you wouldnt have ask this other girl whom you say likes you to expose her cleavage, you should have stayed away rather than encouraged this other girl, joke or not! and has for worrying about what your mates think of your g/f well, what can i say, i mean do you honestly love her like you say you do? maybe you should talk to your g/f about how you are feeling? maybe shes the only one who can stop you feeling guilty about what happened! good luck.
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