A
female
age
30-35,
*xsecretsxx
writes:So, i have been with my boyfriend for ten month in three days and he has changed a lot. When we started dating he didn't hang out with his friends very much even though i told him that he should. He would bring me along sometimes and we would have a blast, and i have become friends with his friends and their girlfriends. However lately has has been going on his own a lot, and excluding me even though i know that the other girls are there, so girls that are single too, which worries me. I called him a couple nights ago around 3 and he told me he would be home in two hours because he was going cutting (wood) with his friends. I waited at home all night until 8 when i called him and he told me brian had called him and he would be home in 20 minutes. An hour and a half later he comes home and lied to me when i asked what he did, he said dinner with the guys and cutting wood, however the lovely bright yellow stamp on his hand told me he went to a strip joint. He did this before the day i assisted in putting my dog down, obviously traumatic and sad for me. I asked him to say but he went out with his friends instead coming home smelling like a stripper. It wouldn't have bothered me as much if he didn't tell me a week before a lap dance is like sex with clothes on.I fear that he is breaking away from me and soon, strippers aren't going to be the only ones catching his fancy. What should i do?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2009): Lap dances and strip joints are not the issue.
Going to one and getting a lap-dance is not a form of sex. Not even in the slightest. And I find it okay for a guy to go there on special occasions, with mates. Not like every day, but at a Bachelor party or birthday bash for men... so long as it stays as a lapdance and harmless fun.
Lying about them, however is NOT acceptable. Because that implies you feel something that you have to hide from someone. And whislt we all have our secrets, feeling like you have to hide the fact as he has done, is disrepectful of you and the relationship you are SUPPOSED to have.
Either way, you need to have a talk to him and tell him lying to you about this sort of shit is a no no and that if her ever does again, he's gone.
Flynn 24
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