A
female
age
26-29,
*ocker_grl_96
writes:Ok so I'm 16 and my bf and I have been dating for almost a year and today my friends had a back to school party, every1 there basically was all over their bf's and stuff but me and my bf aren't like that sobwe just did small cuddling and stuff. Until recenty we had only ever kissed but 1 day we made out 4 like maybe 10-15 seconds so I wasn't sure if it really count but at the party we played truth or dare (of course) and my bf was dared to Make out with me for 20 seconds. It was soooooooo awkward. I mean I have never done it with any1 other than him those 2 times but I read enough to know he was doin it WRONG. Anyway after that game ended we all decided to watch a movie (rocky horror picture show) so it was completely dark really and me, my bf, and 2 of the other couples were on the couch. But like then my bf the whole time was gently running his hand up and down my leg well as time went on he got closer and closer to That spot. Then he kinda just kept his hand like right out side the croth of my shorts and like moved his pointer finger back and forth kinda rubbing me on top of my shorts. Suddenly he got more confident and his fingers slowly started inching into my shorts (from like the side of the crotch area) and when he was almost under my panties I started to get scared thinkin sum1 would notice so I pull his hand away and just cuddled up to him trying to play it off, so was he like trying to finger me or what? Cause after he left the party he text me saying sorry for going to far but it was actualy a total turn on so I told him I was worried about bein caught and that's y i made him stop. Cause it really was. But i don't wanna have sex until like our senior year in high school at least(we r both Jr's now) so was it wrong of me to go that far? Plz help
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female
reader, AmberNuttall  +, writes (26 August 2012):
It wasn't wrong of you to 'go that far', its a wise decision to wait to have sex. Doing other activities together is completely natural as you explore your relationship and eachothers bodies. Only do what you feel comfortable with! You clearly have a boyfriend who understands you and respects your limits. Just explain to him you wish to wait for sex, and you do feel uncomfortable doing things infront of other people. Anything you two wish to do together is completely normal :) just make sure you do want to do it, your not being pressured!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2012): It wasn't wrong of you and your boyfriend doesn't seem to think so either, so there's no reason to be blaming yourself for these events. And just to make this clear, you didn't "go far" as you didn't do anything in this scenario. You were comfortable with him touching you outside your clothes in front of other people, but not inside your clothes. And he seems to respect your limits.
I think if you told him what was really going on in your mind; that your uncomfortable and didn't enjoy making out in front of other people, that you were turned on by his fingering, but you don't want other people seeing, and that you don't want to have sex yet, he'll still respect your feelings.
To me you just seem like a private person...you have nothing to apologize for.
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