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I don't want to have sex now because it hurts!

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 January 2009) 8 Answers - (Newest, 1 February 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

this is slightly embarasing to ask but i really dont know whats wrong with me...

me and my bf have been having sex quite regularly and it never used to hurt, but the past two times it was extremely painful, not because i was tensed up or i wasnt wet enough, nor does it hurt when he inserts...

but during intercourse its like when his penis hits the top part of my vagina(?)it hurts alot!and i get pains in my lower abdomen...

i dont think i have any infection or anything because my discharge etc. is normal...its affecting me quite a bit coz now im actually feeling scared off having sex again because of the pain!!!

View related questions: discharge, vagina

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2009):

I have a similar type of problem but it has happen more than 2 times, though the last 2-3 times have been really bad and makes me wonder if I will enjoy sex any more.

wonder how good a relationship can be when sex is painful. Maybe in those situations you should consider other things like if it means you should only have been friends.

You could try things like a "donut" as suggested or maybe that just seems embarrassing for both partners. Why would I make my spouse feel like (...you fill in the blank...)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009):

Sounds like your cervix wasn't up, were you fully aroused? Try more foreplay next time and if it still hurts, see a doctor =]

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

nope we arent doing anything differently, nor do i have any insertion to prevent pregnancy, thanks ever so much for your replies ...ifit is due to the cervix altering positions should help but if it happens again despite this i defintly will go and see a doctor...

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A male reader, Western3589 United States +, writes (3 January 2009):

Western3589 agony auntWait a week before you have sex again. Then see if you still have the problem. There is also diffrent sex positions you coulg try that would keep his penis away from the sore area of your vagina.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (3 January 2009):

Honeypie agony auntWell, maybe you should try some positions where he doesn't hit your cervix (which is properly what happened)- he might need to do less deep penetrations. Go slow, take your time find a position and tempo that works for the both of you.

However if it continues seeing a gynecologist might be a good idea.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009):

We are not doctors and we can't/shouldn't try to diagnose you. See a doctor and let him/her do the diagnosing there could be an infection with no other visible symtoms such as discharge...

I have experienced that in the past but have no idea what causes it. It just seemed to come and go. I quess I should have seen a doctor, but didn't. I would suggest you do...if it hurts enough to cause you fear of sex, then you need to have it taken care of!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009):

It looks like hes hitting the beginning of ur cervix, and yea that can be pritty painful. I dont knw why its causing a problem now, is he doing anything different that before? maybe hes going a little deeper/harder than before, i dont know. You can go talk it over with a doctor to get more info about it =]

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009):

It sounds like he's reaching your cervix, this can happen if you have a short vaginal canal or if he is quite long. I've had the same problem with a large partner and it wasn't everytime. There are ways around it. Explain to him what the problem is. Try going on top, that way you're in control of how deep he goes. Also having sex side by side can prevent him going deeper. Finally I've not tried this one myself, but apparently you can get penus donuts. They fit on the base of his penis, so he'll still recieve stimulation, but they're wide enough to stop him going in so far. Everyones happy! Hope this helps.

Good luck!

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