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I don't want to go straight to sex... should we try oral or wait?

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 November 2008) 4 Answers - (Newest, 17 November 2008)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

hi

me and my girl friend are both mature for our age , i would like to do more than kissing and snogging but i dont want to go straight to sex. would you recommend us tryin oral or wait till we both feel ready for sex

and yes i really am 14 she is 15

View related questions: kissing, ready for sex

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A female reader, aunty_rach United Kingdom +, writes (17 November 2008):

you are way too young for a sexual relationship!

you are not emotionally mature enough at that age, even simple things like blow jobs can make something complicated. if you really want to try something abit more exciting then just kissing, maybe next time you kiss you could try dry humping? basically just rub your bodies together. it creates an intense makeout session. also will bring you together alot more closely and will turn kissing abit more exciting. but remember don't let it go any further as you are too young. you may think you are mature enough for some sort of sexual activity, but with you asking this question about what sort of thing to do, clearly shows you do not have a good understanding about sexual play. so leave it untill you are older.

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A female reader, CONFUSED AND IN LOVE Turks and Caicos Islands +, writes (17 November 2008):

CONFUSED AND IN LOVE agony auntI think you should wait, until you both are ready. Rushing into sex can complicate things...I know from experienced. There's no need to rush sex, it will always be there, enjoy your childhood.

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (17 November 2008):

DoubleM agony auntJust my opinion, but why don't you just try working on creating a really caring and loving relationship which may last a lifetime. If you introduce a serious sexual episode too early, you can mess up the future for both of you and possibly hate each other forever. Just cool it for a good while - you will better respect each other.

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A male reader, mof United Kingdom +, writes (17 November 2008):

I would suggest that the fact you are 'wondering' if you should try it, SHOULD give you the answer.

Oral sex, or any form of penetrative sex is illegal at your ages, but lets ignore that for a moment. Lets look at the moral/physical issues.

1. Physical, Embarking on sexual relationships may fit in with lifestyle and dare I say peer pressure? A million years ago I was your age matey, and a bag of hormones was me! You run the risk of upping the chances of cervical cancer for your partner - There is one major downfall, know to dreaded STD's - Do you know that diseases such as gonorrhoea can be contracted from oral sex alone? If you were to start having sexual relationships with this young lady and break up, you would find it hard to be in a relationship with someone else and not expect sex.

2. Moral, it is unlikely in today's society that you will remain with this young lady for the rest of your natural lives. When you grow and meet the woman that you may marry, or she the man, the question often raises its head, "How old were you when.....". If other people found out, you would probably be lauded as a 'Jack the lad'. The young lady would have a reputation of being 'easy', something that I am sure you would not want haunting her through her teen and through to young adulthood.

The fact that you have paused and asked the question, suggests a level of maturity. If you can take advice, which is damm harder then giving it! Wait a while, please don't rush. Enjoy each others company and if in a couple of years you still feel the same, I am sure you will be glad you waited.

Some of this is written as a parent. some as a man with memories of what you are going through.

Good luck and continue using the brain in your head young Sir!

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