A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for four years. In the past month he has received emails from a girl that talks like they have a three month long relationship that includes intimacy. Yes my boyfriend shared his email password with me.These on-going emails have details that someone would know only if they were told by him or me. I did not share this info. He claims that he did not cheat on me and continues to stand by that even now a month since all this has come up. He and I even broke up for a day or two because I could not trust him and it made him upset. I don't know what to believe. Did he do it or not? The details in the emails haunt me. Can I trust him? Can we ever be happy again?
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female
reader, tinklinglaughter  +, writes (9 February 2007):
 Umm...I'm sure you feel that the explanation is not really true. It seems like an excuse to me. Having known him for four years, I'm thinking you would be able to tell whether he's lying or not. It's really upto what you do believe and what you want to believe, right? [This might be taking it too far, but do you want to ask that girl if anything's going on between them? Or be a lil snoopy and email the girl from his account as him to see what her replies are like...? That's a lil underhanded though.] But you know what? If you can sense it, chances are good that your instincts are right..Let us know how it goes...Take care..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIn response: His behavior didnt change but thats not saying much cause we havent been completely happy in the last year or so. Some days are wonderful others not so. So to say his behavior changed wouldnt be saying much...it was already different.
His answer was that he shared everything with his cousin and he with his GF and she had big mouth soooooo alot of people might know those details.
I have no real proof. Pics, physical proof or anything.
He gave me his email because I needed to use it to make purchases and corespond with potential employment opps.
Thanks for the feedback. Keep it coming.
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A
female
reader, tinklinglaughter +, writes (8 February 2007):
Wow..this must be tough for you. See, I think you have reasonable evidence to believe that there was something between them. When he denied all this, did you ask him how that girl has knowledge of such intimate details? How, if he didn't share it with her, would she know? If he can justify that, then he may be in the clear. Is there anything else that may have shown that he had something going on with her? Like, did you notice anything out of the ordinary in the past 3 months? Such as in his behaviour, social activities, etc...I'm sure you'll figure the truth out real soon. Do respond if you need or want to clarify anything or include more..
Take care, hon.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2007): Why on earth did he give you his email password in the first place? This seems a slightly silly thing to do because you're showing your insecurity by asking and he's feeding it by letting you read these emails. However, I don't genuinely think he'd let you read his emails if he were having an affair because that would be stupid, even for a man. However, if you can't find it in yourself to trust him then you have to ask yourself whether you have a future. No relationship can survive without trust and despite being told repeatedly that nothing is going on between him and this other girl you still don't believe him.
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