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male
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anonymous
writes:I need help. I don't seem to do well when it comes to women. Fair enough I'm 18 and I've only dated one girl but I was fairly embarassing to be with, e.g. bad eating manners, the fact I'm a geek etc. but it was bad that she broke up with me by text and was leading me on the whole time. So to be honest I don't even know how to date or have a relationship with women. Can anyone give me advice.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2006): And of course, as I should have added after that - treat your woman with good mannerisms. You don't have to open doors for your girl all the time - this depends on what type of person she is.
Be CONSIDERATE and sensitive to your surroundings with her. Now I don't mean be her slave and servant, but if its chilly out and she's not wearing enough, then either take off your jacket and put around her, or hold her close to you with your jacket around her, her hands in your pockets, and your's in hers. If it's raining, and you two go separate ways, give her your umbrella, and before she can react or say no, just run away and blow kisses her away. What is she going to do? Chase after you? Possibly. 8]
Remember, you have your own life, your own hobbies, sports, and friends. However, if it's certain group events like a BBQ, someone's wedding that you're invited to, etc, then invite her along. Never say no, unless there is a good viable reason - eg: "Hey babe, it's a guy's night out. If you wanna come, it means you'll be exposed to perverseness and lots of farting possibly."
DO NOT ASK FOR SEX. Stuff like mind boggles me with teens and especially older people. Sex should come naturally. If you have to ask if you can have sex, it most likely means, you aren't ready for it - no matter how horny you may be. However, there's no rule for not initiating sex, but just remember not to push for it if she pushes you away.
Yeah...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2006): This really depends on the person you're dating. Things like basic mannerisms - "please" and "thank you" and "sorry, I am 2 minutes late" would do just dandy for any type of guy. As for being a certain way, you don't need to absolutely change your image. I'm sure there will be others who would say that people should accept for who you are, but REALITY CHECK - if a slob stays a slob until the day s/he dies of old age, then most likely, s/he will have a much lower chance in finding someone who would accept him/her.
The thing is, at age 18, or at any age actually, there isn't really a 'right' way for a relationship with women. Some people are natural smooth talkers with killer looks to back up their confidence. Some people are wealthy to no end, and back their confidence up with that wealth or the power that associate with that wealth. Some people are good at what they do - either career-wise or sports or creative, music, etc, and they draw confidence from that. With all that said, these people use this confidence that really naturally makes them into a certain type of person, that when combined with the rendezvous of a certain special female or special male, may result in a number of connective effects.
In short, and like I said before, it all really depends on the person you date, and how you pursue that person.
To give you a good confidence booster, I might not be Grand Master Nerd of the Comp Sci and Sci-Ma-Tech classes back in HS, but I was King Geek. [laughs] That was according to numerous people in school - hence the rebellious state I was in. I screwed up quite a few love potentials between then and recently, so if you think about it, you're not that bad. Especially when you've only had one 'girlfriend'.
Some rather good and bad examples of where you can improve yourself psychologically and physically, you can visit AskMen.com. Do NOT go to sites like Maxim or FHM, cuz those are superficial to the bone.
A few pointers: 1) groom and stay clean, 2) try a new look that you are comfortable with, 3) don't try to be something you're not if you're aren't natural about it in the first place, 4) try some new hobbies but nothing too hazardous or something that lowers your self-worth, 5) read more books on various subjects to increase your knowledge of the world and life, 6) being a momma's boy is good cuz it shows you care about your mom and dad but don't let them control you, have a life of your own, they are guidance and not a law, 7) time to start wearing pants that cover your ankles! [wink], 8) when you yawn, cough, sneeze, cover your damn mouth and nose! 9) eat in managably small bites, and drink soup slowly! 10) don't pick your nose and eat it, or flick it somewhere! Go to the washroom away from prying eyes to do your dirty business!!! 11) basically, good hygene... duh!
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