A
male
age
30-35,
*uperman23
writes:hi i have a BIG PROBLEM doing me alot of damages. Ive been in a realtionship for 2 years and the last months i had problems getting an erection when i need to. Or get it really fast and then disapering. My gf broke upp with me then i got a head form 2 different guys in defferent times and after that i really felt bad like awfull. So i dont think im gay at all. I was curious. Now today i had a lady come over to have some fun with and no matter what i tried i couldnt get an erection. What is that problem ?am i gay ?wahts wrong !!!?? im freaking out!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice  +, writes (8 March 2011):
 Hey Superman23,
Take some advice from an old guy. Go see a Doctor. Stop questioning your sexuality. You know what you like. There are a lot of health problems that can cause Erectile Dysfunction. And many of them can happen in young people like yourself. The reason that ED drugs require a prescription is so that a Doctor can look into what might be causing it.
There are also non medical causes of this affliction but I would look into the medical side first.
It is time to man up and go talk to a doc. Don't worry about embarrassment doctors have seen it all and know much more about it than a bunch of strangers online.
FA
A
female
reader, Help mate  +, writes (8 March 2011):
 Stop worrying. Worrying is your biggest problem. Just because you tried sex with guys does not mean you are gay & if you were you should not see that as a problem either.
Stress is the most likely cause of your TEMPORARY problem & it is your own thoughts that are causing the stress.
If you are able to get an erection when you masturbate or even when you wake up in the morning then it is unlikely to be a physical problem. You are just reinforcing the problem by worrying about it. Your mind will automatically take you back to the last time you had sex & if you felt bad about it then it will affect your performance. A good way to make your last sexual experience exciting is just by imagining it. Spend time on your own & make yourself feel nicely relaxed, use some deep breathing exercises a good one is breathe in to the count of seven & breathe out to the count of eleven. When you are feeling nicely relaxed imagine having sex with a wonderful partner imagine having a good stiff erection that lasts until you decide to come. Whilst doing this; think about how it feels to touch & be touched, the smell & what you see; think of as many details as possible but always imagine yourself with a full stiff erection. The more often you do this the better STOP thinking about your last experience the more you focus on that the more of that you will get. Think hard; think big & stop worrying if you have to ask the question am I gay after trying out then clearly the answer is no.
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