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*ebecca332
writes: I dated a guy for a 1 and a half years, and for the first 6 months it seemed perfect, but it then turned sour, yet because I was so in love with him I kept the relationship going. I found out that during the summer he had slept with another girl on holiday in Corfu yet it wasn't through him that I found out. He still denies that he slept with someone but I know him well enough to know that he's lying and this is why we split up. We've been apart for about 6 months now and I have a new boyfriend and our relationship is amazing, he treats me so well and cares for me so much. We've been together for a couple of months now, everything is amazing apart from my past is getting in the way of things such as sex. My boyfriend knows about what happened in my last relationship and assures me that it'll never happen with him but I'm so worried that what happened in my last relationship will happen again. How do I know that the same thing won't happen again and that my boyfriend means what he says?
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2005): It doesn't mean that every guy is a cheat like your last boyfriend. You should give this guy a chance. I know being cheated on is really hurtful and it will be on your mind and if your new boyfriend knows that he will be very understanding and support you well, and make sure he won't make that mistake with you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2005): Don't fall into the trap of, all guys are, well you know. The central most part of a relationship is trust. By not trusting you can protect yourself from some of the pain of a cheater by always expecting the worst but you run the risk of having him think, "well if she doesn't trust me why should I bother being trustworthy?" It is also well to use empathy. How would you feel if he did not trust you and he came to this conclusion by comparing you to his last girlfriend who cheated on him? You will never know for sure that what your new boyfriend says is the truth. You just have to trust him.
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