A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok this is a bit of a messy situation to say the least. i'm seeing this guy lets call him jim and we've been seeing each other for about 2 months. now me and jim are just seeing how things go so we're not in a relationship. things were fine and would spend time with me. he went on holiday for 2 weeks and has been back just under a week now and he hasn't bothered replying to texts and has gone really distant. to make it worse theres another guy involved. now i work with this guy lets call him bob. bob is in a relationship. i know thats not a good start. bob is sweet, caring, makes me laugh a lot and admitted he's falling for me. he's liked me for over a year and i've liked him for a while as well. his girlfriend is posessive, doesn't trust him and they're both miserable. bob and his gilfriends friends that i'm friends with have told me this. we haven't done anything because we're both in relationships (well a relationship of sorts for me) but we both want to.i know the sensible thing to do is cool things off with bob and see where it goes with jim but i can't choose between them. any idea what i should do? i know the sensible thing to do
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2010): bit of an update here. bob and his gf have been together just over a year. jim has started texting me again so i'm probably just overreacting.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (18 September 2010):
 Jim has gone cold turkey on you. He's not taking a few minutes to reply to your texts, there's no relationship there. This seeing each other business is going nowhere. Plus Bob has a girlfriend..slim pickings here. Bob's girlfriend has trust issues which points out Bob could be untrustworthy hence why he is flirting and talking with you.
Jim's not even an option, so that leaves you with Bob who may or may not leave his girlfriend for you. You can't ask him to ditch her, he'd have to do that on his own. How long have they been together? If it's been a long time then chances are high that he won't leave her..i.e. you'll be waiting quite awhile. Really, I would go with d. none of the above. But you seem pretty into Bob so you could wait and see where that goes. A warning though, what he's doing going behind his girlfriend's back who's to say he won't do the same to you? Be careful.
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