A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I ended things for good with a guy last week- after 5 months of seeing each other he told me he didn't think it was ever going to work. He couldn't give me a reason why so I told him I didn't want anything to do with him anymore.The only reason I wanted to cut him out of my life completely is because we've been going round in circles since february- he has confidence issues and although I know he really liked/likes me, every time it seems like our relationship is going to go further he goes cold on me for a couple of days before being all over me again. He had apologised and told me he was trying to sort the issues in his head out but by May i couldn't see it getting any better and just for the sake of my own sanity gave him an ultimatum and said he made things start getting better or we just left it because i didn't feel like it WAS going to get better. I was nothing but nice about it and was so gutted when he said he thought we should just leave it, but i thought we left it on good terms. However he didn't see it that way and took steps to get back at me for ending it and 'giving up' on him which resulted in me being extremely hurt and cutting all contact with him (facebook etc). He seemed to make it clear that he wasn't actually that bothered and i was so upset. A week later, after seeing each other at a club ( i ignored him) he added me back on facebook and after a few weeks we were back to talking constantly and hanging out again. he told me he still liked me and led me to believe that things were actually going to start going somewhere this time. how wrong i was! after asking him where it was going and for him to say he didnt think it was going to work out, AFTER him choosing to leave it and try to fix things with me i felt so messed about that I completely flipped and told him i didnt want anything to do with him anymore.And now I regret it :( i deleted his facebook and his number and everything, last night I saw him at a club again and he spent the whole night staring at me. I was dancing on top of a speaker and he never ever comes into the crowd at that particular place, but last night he did, oh his own, and stood literally like a metre away from me just watching me. I ignored him but it killed me!I dont know what to do :( I know he still likes me and I really really miss him but i don't want to just give in and get messed around. I dont know if I just feel like shit because he hasn't tried to add me back or anything :( even though deep down i don't know why he would because i told him i didnt want anything to do with him. I really dont know what to do, I'm not happy at all :( i don't even really know who's in the wrong here anymore!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, VSAddict  +, writes (21 July 2011):
 You did the right thing. He knew what you wanted and just took advantage of your time and got your hopes up. Don't feel bad about it. He didn't even want to try to change his attitude when you told him how you felt. Be with someone who's willing to make you happy and is straight forward. Move on. You'll get over him.
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