A
female
age
30-35,
*esperateInLove91
writes:Right me and my boyfriend have been dating for nearly 9 months. He used to hate holding hands and cuddling. So i started holding his hand and cuddling him in public and he started doing it back. In the last 3 months this has stopped...he wont cuddle me at home or wont let me cuddle into him. When we are out in public he pulls away everytime i try to cuddle or touch him. Ive explained how i feel and all he says is "you dont need me to do that for you to know i love you because you know how much i love you (even though he never tells me)and you also know im not an affectionate and lovey dovey person". Im just not feeling the love. Is he not into me. Or am i bein daft...
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female
reader, RedAthena  +, writes (10 August 2011):
 No, you are not being daft. Physical affection makes you feel loved.
I am guessing, but when he felt more affectionate, that probably made you feel more connected and close, right?
When he pulls away in public, it probably makes you feel awkward and rejected.
If he tells you that he is not going to do that.
Believe him.
So then what? Well either you put up without complaint or regret that he is not love dovey or tell him that without that, you lose your desire to be close and intimate with him.
The hard truth is that someone who is usually not a hands on, touchy feeling, kind of person is always going to frustrate someone who needs physical contact.
Is it just holding hands and public displays of affection? Is he affectionate in private? (Not leading to sex) or only affectionate in regards to sex?
A
female
reader, macy.lou +, writes (10 August 2011):
 I think at the beginning he was just cuddling and holding your hand because he felt as though he "had too" to impress you, but he's right that just might not be him.. I think you should either accept that as who is and trust him, or maybe the relationship isn't worth it if you need touchy/feeling stuff to know that he loves you.
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