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I am in love with my sisters husband

Tagged as: Age differences, Cheating, Family, Marriage problems, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 October 2007) 9 Answers - (Newest, 30 December 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

i am 18yrs old, i m in luv wth 39yrs old man(my sisters husband) and he love me too. but he is married and has a kid. the worst part of it is that we live in the same house. He is nice and lovely. He respects me a lot, but sometimes when we are together with his wife he romances her in my presence. I told hm we shld quit but he says no. what shld i do?

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A female reader, alishaxx United Kingdom +, writes (30 December 2009):

Hey i think the last comment was abit strong meaning wrong. I know how it feels to love someone but and how its hard to see them with another person but thats with me and a guy my age and is also a friend but what your doing is wrong i mean hes 39years old and also youir brother-in-law and if he's acting all lovey to your sister means he does not reaspect you. If he can cheat on his own wife wiv his sisters he can do the same thing to you. Find someone that is right for you someone that is out their someone single and your age not a 39year old man that really wrong.

You and your sister have good times and bad times every sisters have that but forget the bad times and remember the good times you had with your sister and just think how unfair your being with her. Shes your sister not some friend that you think oh well lets betray her its not like im going to be with her for the rest of my life this is your sister your family and family have to stick together.

Please just tell your sister whats been going on between you and him she will be mad and i mean really mad but your just a kid and it will take her time to understand but her 39year old husband will get it and get it hard.

Dont end and destroy your relationship with your family because of a outsider your family is all you got and if you lose that you wont have anywhere to go trust me on that.

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A female reader, Sara123 United Kingdom +, writes (1 April 2009):

Hi, Nobody does it purposely to another woman and that too own sister. You can try negotiating with your sister about a sharing arrangement. As you are both in one house, this may be more convenient to all three involved.

If your sister refuses to share, then you got to get out of there. After some time, you might be able to forget him and find another man.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2008):

You need to live that unhealthy relation ship alone. and tell you sister. family is a life time deal and live that man alone

he does not love you or you sister

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (18 October 2007):

eyeswideopen agony auntHe is hardly "nice and lovely" and you are just as bad. To do this to your own sister is beyond words. Move out.

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A female reader, sexi South Africa +, writes (18 October 2007):

sexi agony auntHi

This guy is playing you and your sister. If he can do this to your sister with you then he can hurt her with anyone else. He doesnt want to end what you have but he displays affection with your sister in front of you (Which he has a right to as she is his wife) This is only about you and him, your sister and their child are also involved. Have some respect for yourself and put an end to whatever you have. Dont do this to your sister and mist of all to yourself. There are guy out there for you that are not married and would give you undivided attention. Go out and meet other guys.

Regards,mail me if you wanna talk

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A female reader, brooke5426 United Kingdom +, writes (4 October 2007):

brooke5426 agony auntyou are being incredibly selfish. all you are thinking about is yourself and how much of a problem it is for you that this man has a wife and a child...the wife and child in question are your family! why on earth would you do something so cruel and life destroying to people you love??

i have very strong feelings about women who get involved with other womens men at the best of times but to do it to your own sister is despicable. especially when she is letting you live in her home and making you part of her new family. you need to do the decent thing and leave them alone. move out if you can, and stop this insanity now. your sister will probably find out one day what her husband is really like because people like that seldom change, so im sure he will cheat on her again with someone else but at least the pain will not be as bad as knowing the extent of betrayal she has had by her own flesh and blood.

it would be better for you to move out too. you cant carry on in this "relationship", it wont go anywhere and to be honest is probably nothing more than a sick thrill to him because he knows that having sex with you is wrong. you will find it much easier to forget about the mistake you have made and get on with your life if you are not living in his house.

good luck

brooke

x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2007):

End it with him, what an horrible sister you are. She puts you up and you repay her by sleeping with her scum of a husband. Your my age as well, a 39r man isn;t worth it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2007):

You know what you should do. End it. Period.

You only think you love him, and he's using you in just about the most despicable way possible.

Sooner or later your sister will discover what's going on here, and then you'll be in more trouble than you've been in for a long time, and one of you will probably end up having to leave the house because suddenly it won't be big enough for both of you.

BUT - your brother-in-law, being that much older than you, should not be taking advantage of you like this, and although you're flattered by his attention and it might feel nice at the time, you should distance yourself from him. You'll be the worst person in the world in her eyes if your sister finds out.

You can hardly say he respects you, he's deceiving his wife and abusing you all under one roof. Wake up and smell the coffee!

Phil

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A female reader, rockelle United States +, writes (4 October 2007):

rockelle agony auntYou are sleeping with your sisters husband. That is one of the most disrespectful things that one sister can do to another. Sisters share a lot of things, but a man should not be one of them.You say he is married and has a kid like that wife he is married to isn't your sister and that kid isn't your niece/nephew. Your sister has you living in her house probably because you have no where else to go and that is how you thank her. By f***ing her husband. Needless for me to say, you need to leave this man alone. I hope that your sister finds out and puts you out on the street.

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