A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:A night or so ago, my husband and I were getting ready for bed and started fooling around. This is normal, except we decided to try something new this time. Neither of us had participated in oral before so we figured it might be fun. Since then though, I've started having mini panic attacks whenever I even think about it. Or sex in general. Is this normal? What can I do about it?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've never been sexually abused in my past, and my family wasn't super religious. They taught me sex was to be enjoyed. I'm thinking this just isn't my thing. There are other things we have tried that I've been uncomfortable with, just because I couldn't see his face. We did try one more time just to see how we really felt about it, but this time I just started full on crying after and couldn't stop for who knows how long. He felt like it was kind of impersonal anyway. I think it's just something we're not going to continue. We'll stick to things we know we enjoy :)
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 December 2012):
 NOPE NOT normal. and if it continues I strongly suggest therapy to NIP IT IN THE BUD.
did you have a bad experience? IF so that could explain the panic attack.
for me to perform oral I have to have control... I prefer my husband on his back or side for it not straddling my face.... and if he must straddle my face for some hot fantasy of his my arms and hands must be free so I can shove him off of me as needed.
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A
female
reader, breath_in +, writes (26 December 2012):
 I'm no doctor but its probably just nerves . your probably just really nervous and worried your not doing it right which is normal for your first time because its new and its hard to process what just happened but trust me it will get better you just got to relax and enjoy it ,both of you should don't be embrassed if your not good its the first time for both of you so its not like your both experts to him you are litarally the best hes ever had .
so relax and enjoy every moment of it because the acts meant to please both of you not stress you both out .
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2012): No this is not normal.
When you were doing oral for the first time did you enjoy it? Were you happy with how it turned out? Or was there any negativity attached to it?
Were you raised in a very religious atmosphere and taught that sex should only be for procreation or else you will go to hell?
Have you been sexually violated in any way in your past?
Do have trust issues with your husband?
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (26 December 2012):
 When is having a panic attack full stop, normal?
It's the first time that you did it, did it go well? Or not? Maybe you feel embarrassed about how you performed?
I'm sure over time you will get used to the act and it will become less of a shock to your system and just another part of sex.
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