A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am 60 dating a retired 54 year old woman.she has a 22 yo son and his best friend age 22 year old friend living in the same house. I could accept her son in our relation but I am concerned about the male friend living in the same house in terms of privacy and potential sensual relation of my girlfriend and the young man.This makes me unconfortable. There is no way the 22 year old male friend will be willing ti leave her houses My girfiend has also told me he will not be leaving the house at least for two years.I don't spend time with her but weekends. under the circumstances - have decided to break up the relation. Your advice?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (21 August 2012):
 Wow that’s quite a jump you’ve got here. I realize you find her attractive and therefore think everyone will find her attractive but to make the assumption that she’s sexual with a boy that is her son’s friend is wrong.
I think for her sake you are right to break off the relationship. You have some very skewed ideas about why women have sex.
A
female
reader, Candid Cally +, writes (21 August 2012):
Are you certain the son and his friend are only best friends?
Under what circumstances did the son's friend come to live in the house? If she has known him since he was a boy it is extremely likely she views her son's friend as another son!
Unless you have any evidence of improper behavior between your son's friend and your girlfriend you are probably overreacting by breaking up with her. However, if you feel like you cannot have a girlfriend who is generous enough to provide a home to her own child's best friend, that is your decision to make.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (21 August 2012):
 Why on earth are you assuming your girlfriend will have sexual relations with her son's friend? What are you basing this assumption on? Have you any thing other than the fact he is male and she female? Do you really have such a low opinion of her that you believe she will not be able to resist sex with this young man?
Have you spoken to her about your fears or are you worried she might be offended, I know I would be!
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A
male
reader, grymsoul +, writes (21 August 2012):
 This may sound harsh, but maybe a 22 year old guy would find nothing attractive in a 50+ year old woman. She's nearly three times his age. I doubt anything sexual could actually go on between them. Then again, I myself was attracted to a 45 year old woman at one point. I'm 23.
I still say that you didn't have to break up with her because of insecurities. You should try talking to her about the situation. I'm not sure how she'll take it knowing that you are jealous of a guy young enough to be her son. In fact, her son and the friend are best friends. I doubt that the friend would cross the line to be with the mother. Then again, I don't know either of them.
You should have more confidence in yourself. You breaking up with her won't help the situation at all. If anything, it will probably push her further into seeking the comfort of another man. Do you see where I'm going there? Good luck. Hope you do the right thing.
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