A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hey guys just wanted your help plz. I have been with my gf for nearly 7months we have a good relationship. i dnt know whether im in love with her, bt i do feel close ot her. she says she has never felt like this for anyone before which is quite touching. i have never felt comfortable and able to be myself with a girl b4.Only i have problem. i dont know whether its depression or not. She is my first girlfriend and we are still both virgins. she has been with two other guys before, one for about two months and one for two weeks .they both cheated on her. she has also had a fling n kissed a few random guys. Ok i know she had done all that before she was with me and i appreciate her being honest with me. But it bothers me she is more experience. Im an allrite looking guy n i have liked girls before but for sum reason i never had the balls to take it further. i had a fear of rejection. The problem i have is that i also want to be experienced but at the same time i dont want to lose this girl, I keep feeling regret that I havnt had experience before and that was down to my low self confidence. i keep wanting 2 turn the clock back. I feel stupid that i want to be experienced, but i dont want any other girl but this girl at the moment. I dont want to let her go also cuz i have a fear that no other girl will want me. I havnt had a good experience with girls and being rejected hurts. i also regret other areas of my life and feel low about myself. I want to have a vision in my life n go forward n make my family happy. I also want to be happy with my girl!!! she does care for me like no1 other girl has.I keep having this burning feeling within me everytime the thought of her past comes up. i dont make myself think of her past it just happens. the silly thing is she hasnt even done much in comparison to other 20year old girls. it bothers me cuz shes done more then me! i keep wanting to ask about the guys n what they did together. I know that when she tells it will make it worse, so i dont ask. I need help in this area to. I dont know whats wrong with me. my head is in a mess! I also feel envious of her friendship group. its so nice how they are close n chat to each other. im always wishin i had that. Dont get me wrong. i do appreciate all of my close friends but im always comparing myself not only to my gf bt other people too and i feel my life isnt that good. I am under alot of pressure from family at the moment too and feel i cant do things, even things like geting a house sorted for them. Just the thought of responsiblity, I dont believe in myself. Its even lil things like on msn, everytime i sign on not everyone talks to me and i feel keep having to make the effort. Even on facebook, stupid tings like writing on peoples on walls( writing messages) this bothers me cuz no1 writes just like that on my wall. whereas on my gfs wall so many people write things and i feel like crap and no1 cares about me. Theses feeling have happening for a long time n i want to get ride of them! I am always masturbating too, i find it helps but im doing it too much! Can someone help me sort out my life n show me how to be positive outlook? am i depressed??. Im always having this fake smile for people n they think im a happy person bt im not deep down. HELP ME PLEASE SOMEONE SORT ME MY LIFE OUT FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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both virgins, confidence, depressed, facebook, her past, msn, want to be happy Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, iwillhelpyouthroughit +, writes (10 July 2007):
 you are not alone
i no this isnt helping but i've just been feeling like that
not in a relationship but i always find myself comparing me 2 my best friend and i always feel i have to make the effort on msn and myspace and stuff
i masturbate far 2 much and i reli hav low self convidence
i've found that wenever i start feeling jealous i think of all the people who like me for me and not cuz i'm such and suchs friend
and i find that if i calm down and think of postive things it will all get better
i sometime think i could just b depressed but i dont think it's that serious yet!
i suggest that you stop concentrating on how your not like your g/f and had loads of experience and make experience for yourself i mean 7months is a long time to be with someone, so really your busy having an experience
and as for the friends matter, theres always going to be thoose annoying people in life who have far to many friends to remeber! so cheer up and smile it sounds like you've got a lush g/f and concentrate on doing special stuff with her
and as for your friends if you spend loads of time with them they myt just b as special to you as your g/f and her m8s
sorry if that didnt help at alll
xx
A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (10 July 2007):
 Hey babe, maybe think about seeing a doctor, they could help.. Just because your girlfriend has a past of experience, doesnt mean there is anything wrong with you and it certainly doesnt mean you are to feel anything differnet for her. Believe her when she tells you she has never felt this way before, like you would expect her to believe you.. I hope i helped, Mail me if you want to talk x x x
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