A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've Known my Girlfriend for 2 years before we hooked up as being good friends. The reason we didn't hook up before in the past, is that she was already in a relationship. what makes it interesting is that it was with another Girl. Anyway to make a long story short she has been hurt in her previous relationships (both guys and girls, though she only was with one guy in her high school years which I think what might had brought her to other women.) So she wanted to try guys again, and she actually asked me out. So we spent a week with each other. (I now live in another state) When we were together that week at some point she left her cell phone on the table when she went to the shower. I really didn't want to, but call it curiosity, I flipped through her text messages and found something I fear would probably happen to see in some extent. She had text her ex (the one she was seeing 2 years ago) That she don't know if she Likes guys and she didn't know if she should just end it with me or not. It hurt a bit when I read it, but from day one I've always told her that if she feels uncertain about our relationship she only needs to say so, nothing that would happen in that week would change the 2 years of friendship we had together. I stop reading her text after seeing that as I didn't want to know what her ex would say. (I can only imagine.) But she sent her that text on day 3 I was there and it was now day 7. We've been sexually active with each other every day I was there (with her being the one to initiate it), so I didn't see any indication of possible problems. So when she got out, I kind of hinted if there was anything she wanted to talk about now would be a good time as we were sitting around the coffee table. Then I told her a bit of a white lie and said that when we were at the bar (day 3) I saw her typing something on her phone to someone about "I don't know if I should end it" deal. So we talked and she said at first that's how she was feeling, but now she was feeling a little better about it. But she still not too sure about everything just yet. but she still wanted to be together.Now that I'm back in my state, we talk to each other every day. well we really did that before as friends but now a little more intimate. I'm going to fly out there during spring break. I've always told her I rather see her happy and be a little hurt as long as we can stay friends, then her not being happy in something she doesn't want any longer just to make me happy. My question is while I preparing myself that this might not end well. I do want to make it work. What can I do to make sure if Shit does hit the fan we can still be friends? We do have a pretty open convo and nothing really is off limits to talk about. Though I don't ask too much, as probably of a Embarrass type of thing, or I haven't really thought about it. Any advice? I do really want to work though.
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female
reader, girl from bristol  +, writes (24 January 2010):
hi she wants to be with you good sign she just is not sure whether she likes guys i would go and see her and ask her i think she must like guys otherwise she would not want to be with you maybe she just needed time to get used to being with a guy again dont prepare yourself for anything and see what happens i think she will want to be with you
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