A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Wife bought waist trainer corset. When I first saw it on her, she looked super sexy; tiny waist with huge boobs (DD; what a dream. I made the mistake of telling her how hot she was and as a result, she started wearing it all the time. Over time, she mentioned that she gets a lot of looks which doesn't make me happy and now the last few weeks, she bought and started wearing skin tight jeans and her tops have gotten more tighter and revealing. I've tried to have conversations but she seems to be obsessed with her new look and the attentions shes getting. I know she loves me but this is getting out of hand. Can anyone recommend an approach
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2019): I'm going to veer away from the general consensus here.
I think feeling sexy is good. A boost in self esteem is also good. But she's objectifying herself. She's married! Surely she can find other ways to feel good about herself? Life isn't all about seeking the FLEETING attention of others. It's meaningless at the end of the day. She's just making herself out to be a piece of meat. People look at big tits, not because she's special.
A
male
reader, Billy Bathgate +, writes (17 August 2019):
Enjoy it and do not let your jealousy or insecurity get the better of you!
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (17 August 2019):
 It is never a mistake to make your wife feel sexy. Let her enjoy it. I dont see why you feel this is a problem. She found something that makes her feel good, apparently. Maybe you didnt show her enough attention before, and that is why she continues with this? Try to make her feel sexy when she is not all «dressed up» and see if that helps.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2019): I do not think that is obsessive for your lady to want to look trimmer and be noticed by men and women who she encounters! Also OP, if smiles, looks from men, and compliments happen to boost your wifes self confidence and tends to get her all horned up, YOU are the one who is going to reap the heavenly rewards the she presents, in your bedroom! Please do not rain on your ladies parade OP. Good looks and youth are very fleeting so please let her have her time in the spotlight! Be proud of her and be thankful that she is faithful to you and is trying to look good, for YOU! This is a minor thing in life. Bless you, for not crushing her feelings! You know she is worth your kindness and compassion! Best wishes!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2019): Ask her if the new underwear is comfortable ... She will probably say no. Then point out that she looks good without it. Give her compliments when she's not wearing it. Then over time she will probably not bother any more. Why be uncomfortable? There's no point.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2019): One thing I should caution her about, is that kind of constriction of your internal organs can cause some serious health-issues. That's what you should be concerned about, if anything! Discomfort and deterioration of the product will soon force her to discontinue use. Had you shown her more appreciation for her appearance, she wouldn't being going overboard.
Be gentle and urge her to discontinue use of constricting under-garments that might cause health-problems over-time. Mention it to her doctor, so he or she can back you up on it!
DO NOT INSULT HER OR BURST HER BUBBLE BY DEGRADING HER; OR BELITTLING HER FOR WANTING TO BE PRETTY!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2019): Well, must I repeat myself yet again???
INSECURITY KILLS RELATIONSHIPS!!!
Oh for heaven's sake, man! Allow the woman a boost to her self-esteem! Do you have a real problem? Is she cheating on you? Is there a lack of passion in your marriage? Is she mean to you? Does she deny you intimacy?
She wants to look good! You gave her a compliment that gave her confidence, and no one benefits more from that than YOU!
It isn't just her physical-appearance drawing more attention to her. She always got attention, you're just beginning to notice; because you really didn't care until now!
It's her new-found confidence and a release from the bondage of low self-esteem. You failed to acknowledge her beauty until you noticed a drastic change from the usual. Had you let her know you loved her body as it was all along; you wouldn't be here with this silly complaint against her for wanting to be seen as attractive. This is how a person behaves when they've been deprived of something they've really needed!!!
Please comeback when you need advice for a real relationship problem.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 August 2019):
 First of all how much research has she done into those things?
https://www.doctoroz.com/episode/oz-investigates-waist-training-it-safe
They really aren't something women should wear as much as "fashion" and the Kardashians suggest.
However, THAT isn't really YOUR concern, is it? You are more worries that OTHER men now also pay more attention to her and then what?
If she is a shapely woman, men will notice her. If she is pretty or tall OR... (in your wife's case) because she feel CONFIDENT about HERSELF, men are paying attention.
What you want to do is tell her she "can't" dress a certain way because ONLY you are allowed to enjoy her "hot new looks" and sorry, OP, that isn't how life or marriage works.
The more you TRY and CONTROL how the looks the more she will WANT to dress that way and the MORE you push her away. It's a PRETTY unattractive trait when a guy tries to CONTROL his partner's clothing choices.
She isn't your property, she is your wife.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (15 August 2019):
 I recommend that you step back and admire the fact that you have such a trophy wife! This sounds like more of an insecurity issue for you rather than an "obsession" for her. You say that you "made the mistake of telling her how how she is". WHY was that a mistake?? She is looking this good FOR YOU! Yes, her ego is being boosted by the attention she is getting all around, but she's not flirting or cheating, and you must understand and TRUST that no other guy is going to "steal" her away from you.
Just chill out and enjoy your hot looker of a wife! Never make the mistake of withholding a compliment just because you're insecure about marriage power balance or other people's attentions! She married YOU, not someone else!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2019): The only reason women get ‘obsessed’ with their looks is because men are so obsessed with being superficial . If men paid less attention to women just based on their youth and bodies and treated women as human beings then they wouldn’t need to worry about this
Perhaps if you had of complimented her on her wonderful personality , intelligence or kindness ( in other words - value her for things that matter rather than looks like all of society seems to think that’s all a woman’s worth is ) then you wouldn’t be dealing with this
You’ve now sent her the clear message that one of the most important an dthe best thing about her is her body and looks so you can really do much except accept it or move on
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