A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm a little confused as to where I stand in my relationship.I have been seeing a guy for 3 months now. We're just now exclusive and for the most part he seems genuinely interested in being with me. We didn't jump into dating, it was very slow and easy. We have a great time together and I'm always left wanting more. We have an active sex life, and keep in communication every day mostly through texts. We see each other 3-4 times a week for hours at a time. We don't see each other every day and I like that, it keeps things in perspective and makes it more exciting when we see each other.The issue that I'm having some trouble with is that he's planning all of these trips throughout the year and hasn't invited me to any of them. Is that normal? It's not something that bothers me a ton but I'm still a little put off by it. I guess I'm having trouble figuring out how much space you can have between each other while maintaining a relationship and not just being casual... Should I be worried about him taking these trips? Should I be planning my own trips without him?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2011): It really depends on the situation...what trips are we talking about like long period of time and to where? If he wants you in his life then he should've talked to u first but it could be casual and take your consideration into account.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (28 March 2011):
 You both are in quite a new relationship and it is perfectly normal for each of you to be living your own lives as well. I dont think that you should be worried about him taking those trips as long as you are both getting on well then it shouldnt be a problem, you are still only young and should be enjoying yourself as well outside of the relationship so just make sure you make time to hang out with your friends and do things with them that dont involve your boyfriend. Goodluck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2011): Well I mean that's good that you both are taking it at a pace you both feel comfortable with. But I mean it's good to change up the routine a bit. Your relationship sounds like it came out of a manual for dating...might get a little bland. It's good to keep things exciting and out of the ordinary. There is nothing wrong with dropping your guards and spending a week together (ooh imagine that!) having crazy sex or whatever floats your boat. It sounds like there is a rigid guard up perhaps on his part. And it sounds like it is up to you to change it up a bit, spice things up. R u sure you really like this guy? If you said yes then maybe try pulling back a little bit. Don't answer everytime he calls or everytime he asks you out. Play a little hard to get, see how he reacts. Just to see how he really feels about you. If he loses his cool you'll know he really likes you and he will probably start putting in more effort and time into the relationship. aka maybe he will even ask you on one of the trips.If you show him not to count on a routine (which clearly you both are in one) he will always be on his toes with you. You both need to be a little more spontaneous. There is nothing wrong with taking it upon your self to change it up to your liking. You could even suggest going away with him for a weekend. Or spending a weekend together. If you want to see more of him (understandably) then bring it up!
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