A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:When a guy asks you out, and you don't like him that way, how do you say no? Because there is this guy who likes me (I've had over twelve people, a few of which i don't really know, but they knew my name, tell me. He stares at me in class. He always tries to talk to me and whenever i talk to another guy he gets all moody) and has a reputation of over reacting when a girl turns him down. For example, this one girl said no and he he started calling her a b*tch and saying horrible things about her. From what I hear she responded with "no, i'm sorry. You're really nice, but i don't like you that way." Now about five of the twelve are telling me he's going to ask me out and I'm scared. I don't like him like that. He's not really the type of person I'd want to be in a relationship with personality wise, and i like someone else. How can i say know without him freaking out? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks!! I'm still being told he's gonna ask me out but alot of people are asking would I go out with him/do i like him, and to both of which I've said no. They're friends with him too and hopefully they'll get the message back.
A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (11 June 2011):
 Maybe he overreacted because he's got issues, or maybe he overreacted because he got emotionally invested in her. If the latter, she may have had a hand in it by not shooting him down quickly and clearly (do you know if this was the first time she tried to shoot him down or not?). Still doesn't excuse him flipping out, though.
In any case, it doesn't matter. Nine times out of ten, the best way to deal with shooting a guy down is some variation of "I'm flattered that you ask, but I'm sorry, I'm not interested." Optionally, if you think he's a decent guy, you can add, "I'd be happy to introduce you to one of my friends." In other words, the girl you mention did everything right.
He might freak out anyway. You have to accept that sometimes, if the other person is not going to be reasonable, there is *nothing* you can say or do to avoid a confrontation. Just grit your teeth, say it nicely, and walk away if he freaks out. Keep some friends close if it makes you nervous, but tell them not to interfere unless things are going to get physical - which seems unlikely to me, but it never hurts to prepare.
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