A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Tell me, why is it that when we women think we are being as direct as can be with our needs (not just sexual) don't seem to get it? Is there a certain way we should be phrasing our needs or does a man understand what we are saying but does not know how to respond to what we need? I'm being sincere in asking for ways to express oneself that will be clear and yet not demanding or full of assumptions and yet will generate some sort of positive response ( or any response will do! lol) . Anyone have some good ideas? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2009): There is no real universal advice to your question, because each person is slightly different than the other. For me, if my girl has something important she needs me to hear, I'll make sure my work is finished or out of sight and I don't have other stuff I need to do immediately, then give my full attention to her.
As for how she should phrase anything, just say it how it is. get to the point. Don't sugar coat anything. Make it clear. Be blunt if she has to. Turn the damn television off, even though I watch it once or twice a month, maybe. Tell me exactly what you want to say. Don't add unnecessary words in it.
Instead of saying, "I know you're extra sensitive about so and so and I would like you to know how that I have no problems with you being friends with him, but I just want to tell you that......"
I would prefer that she just say, "I have a problem with your friend X. He's been saying things to me that makes me feel uncomfortable."
Then again, that's me.
A
male
reader, ArmyMedic  +, writes (8 March 2009):
 I usually agree with Otherstarfish, but on this occasion I would say don't treat him like you would a woman, talk to him slowly and clearly, in language he will understand and make sure it's when he is not distracted (this is the difficult bit, we are so easily distracted), as soon as you get an uh huh, or yes dear, stop and try again some other time.
And some guys are just useless either it goes in and they don't know what to do, or just can't be arsed. Others it just doesn't go in at all.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2009): yes a) don't nag b) don't treat them different to women ...
star.x.
...............................
|
