A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have recently started going out with a boy I really like, and it has been a week already and it's going great. But the only thing spoiling it is the teasing from my classmates. I'm not very popular in my year. I was usually in the middle, and I have a lot of close girl friends. I know that the teasing shouldnt bother me if I like this guy, but I have a confidence issue. I used to be bullied when I was younger and get scared when I have to speak out to the class. They have left me alone for the last 2 years, but now I have a boyfriend that goes to the same school, and they know, the same bullies are at it. I'm really happy with this guy, and I really dont want the teasing (some of it quite humiliating actually) to get to me, but I need some help and motivation. Can you help?
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bullied, confidence, teasing Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThey started making fun of us in the corridor and we both had amazing comebacks, and they look stunned and left us alone! I'm so happy with me, and we have the confidence to act like a couple at school!
Thanks for your help!! xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank youHe understands how I feel about it. He feels the same way, but we have decided to just grit our teeth and get through it. It's just high school is so awkward because I just want my life to be happy and easy so I can focus on friends and exams and my boy/f etc. they are just making going to school a horrible part of my routine. i just want them to leave me alone. it affects us because if we are walking together in the corridor they shout stuff and tell everyone we've had sex, even though it's only been a week.As for self-discovery, I am very good at sport and recently won trophies and medals. People aren't impressed by it and it doesnt affect teasing at all. I was elated with myself before the bullying, i was so confident within my group of friends, but they are just ripping at the confidence i had managed to build up. i just want them to leave me alone.the bullies are really immature, but they are the most popular people in the school. they easily spread rumours and have the confidence to shout out stuff in class infront of everyone, and i just choke up and try to hide away. what can i do? :'(
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2010): Dear Op,
I used to suffer from the same thing. Still have some issues with it from time to time but its gotten a lot better. What I did that got a lot of people to shut up was to dedicate my time to something. I ended up getting really good at a board game and pushed myself. I'd recommend trying something that you've always wanted to do. Be it dance, martial arts, a new kind of job or anything. What ever you do, build the confidence in yourself and don't depend on someone or something else. You could go on personal dates with yourself and help find yourself. Everyone will say something and honestly what do they really know? Nothing. Just recall that when someone calls you a name or something or anything its a reflection of themselves, their inner insecurity in themselves that they r reflecting outside of themselves. I mean why else would they be thinking it?
You'll get ther op I have faith.
Best of Luck!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2010): Hun, when i started dating my boyfriend (of two years now) my classmates teased me and constantly told me that i deserved better and that he was just too obnoxious. But i saw threw his faults and truly fell in love with him. I know it sounds hard, but you just need to ignore what people say. He should be willing to help you through this and comfort you. Don't give him up because of some immature high school kids.
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