A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok where should i start !!! My girlfriend and i have been together for almost 5 years. She moved in with me after we dated for 1 year. In the last 5 years we have been threw it all... I have cheated on her both emotionally and physical, and even tho i cheated she stayed with me. She knows that i have cheated with about 5 girls and we still stayed together probably because we were both stuck living together. Last year we broke up i had a fling on the side which hurt her deeply and which i regret, soon after my fling ended we ended up being intimate with each other which resulted in her getting pregnant. We both are against abortion so we had a baby boy. During her pregnancy our relationship was perfect it was like we just started dating again. Everything seem perfect up until our son was 9 months old, then she told me that she feels nothing for me... Having a baby has honestly changed me for the better. I no longer want to cheat nor will i let that happen. And she knows that im a changed man since i have a son now. But how can i get her to fall back in love with me? I cant stand the thought that one day she will move out and take our son. Does anyone have some advice? By the way im 29 years old and she is 27.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): Now that the baby is here, she knows what REAL love feels like and after putting up with your cheating, what she feels for you just can't compare.
I don't know if it's possible to get someone you've hurt so deeply to love you the same way she once did. All you can do is continue to be the best man you can be and hope that you can at least regain her respect.
A
female
reader, hpoco  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 When she says she has no feelings for you at all, I have to say I think that is not true. I'm sure that she does, be they good/bad feelings, I can guarantee she feels something. There must just be something blocking her, stopping her from accessing her feelings for you. Its probably mountains of hurt, and also perhaps heavy amounts of obligation you share, since you have a child now.
All the aunts have given you the best advice already: love her. Love her continually, and deeply and purposefully. Rediscover each other. Try to provoke her into finding the ways that she loves you too. Get to know her again. Expect some possible weird behavior while she get over whatever it is that is stopping her from knowing how she feels for you. Talk a lot and hope for the best, don't expect her to leave you. Good luck, I hope things get better.
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A
male
reader, Myau  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 It a simple matter of undoing all you have done.
Take care of her, make her feel important and special. It will take along time to turn this around but I think you wont regret it
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2010): did she just say she feels nothing for you? or did she say she doesn't want to stay with you anymore?.. cos if she said the first, then she wants you to win her trust. if she said the second i think she has made up her mind.
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (4 April 2010):
 She may fall back for you. She may not. You see, each time you cheated, each time you hurt her, a little of her love for you disappeared. By now it's all gone. You used it up. Now you want to make amends, and it won't be easy.
The only thing you can do now is be the best man and father you can be. Be thoughtful, treasure your child, and support and contribute to their lives. Seek to earn her respect instead of her love.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Brunel  +, writes (4 April 2010):
Earn that respect - tell her each day how much you love her, make time for the two of you. Find out what she really likes, do new things picnics parks things that the three of you can do. Compliment on her looks watch and learn what sex she likes.
Clearly you are a first class shit - but just try a little more evry day. If you don't wash and iron hoover and dust? It might be she loves you too so she may not want to go ever. The task is yours if you choose to take it!
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (4 April 2010):
 All you can do now is to love her with all your heart and mind .Put her on your top priority list , pay attention to what she says and wants and be willing to walk that extra mile.
Good luck to you .
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