A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi, I'm 15 and have always been insecure in relationships and myself, but have only just realised. I really hate being like this, I constantly feel that my boyfriend will leave me for another girl; I suppose I feel this way because I feel I'm not as pretty as some girls in his school so he'll prefer them to me. I'm not sure where my insecurity's have come from but I'm guessing it was from primary school being bullied and told I'm ugly. I want to be confident in myself and not constantly feel that my boyfriend will leave me.Does anyone have any ideas on how I can become confident and get rid of these insecurities? Thank you :)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (23 December 2007):
Firstly your boyfriend is with you and not these other girls, if he wanted to be with them im sure he would be, but he obviously wants to be with you. And secondly who says you are not as pretty as those other girls, i bet you are, and i bet your boyriend thinks so to. I think ultimately you need to work on building your self esteem and confidence up abit. Whenever you get a spare half hour find a quiet spot at home where you can be on your own, pull the curtains, maybe light a candle or an insence stick and concentrate on your breathing. Lie back and notice each breath going in and out while thinking positive confident thoughts, maybe envisage a scene where you are totally confident and things in life are going the way you want them to. Tell your self that you are beaufiful, attractive, that you are a smart confident funny person who has a boyfriend that chose you over everyone. Sometimes its good to picture your self in your favoutite place, maybe walking along the beach, or though a meadow on a summers day, or even create a place in your mind. Whenever you get a spare half hour do this excersise, and after you will feel revitalised refreshed and confident. Also if you are out have a look in WH Smiths or any book shop, and look for the Paul Mckenna hypnosis CDS for esteem & confidence. I have tried these and found them to be very useful.
All the best & merry Christmas x
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