A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with my boyfriend a month ago, we were together for 2 years. I've just moved into a new place a few days ago and he is still living with my brother and another friend of his. I had been unhappy for months with him and asked him to come to couples therapy with me and he refused, and we ended up breaking up. I saw him yesterday at his place when I went to pick up a few things, and he seemed to be really happy and having a great time being single. My brother said he thinks he is enjoying the partying and all of his extra friends time now, but says that it will slowly sink in that he has lost me, in a couple of weeks. I know it sounds bad, but it makes me feel even worse that he is having such a great time without me, when I'm feeling pretty miserable. When he split with his ex gf he was still chasing her 2 years later, but with me he his over it in a flash it seems. I know I shouldn't compare but I have always been jealous that our relationship was not as good as theirs. I don't want to get back with him and it was my idea to break up, but I still feel bad about him moving on so quickly, and I keep worrying about him sleeping with someone new when I'm not ready for that. How can I make him realize what he has lost? How can I stop caring about whether he hooks up with girls? How can I get on with my own life and accept that the relationship is over?
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your feedback. I'm trying to take it one day at a time but I still miss him terribly. I know that it's for the best that it's over but it doesn't stop me from feeling lonely. I have decided that I dont want to know anything more about what he is up to, because I know it will just upset me. So I guess that's a little bit of progress!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2013): Honey he really doesn't give a rats ass. I am glad you did what you did. There are lots of men out there that want a committed one on one relationship. He made his bed why should you give him anymore of your time or consideration. Move on and hold your head high.
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (13 May 2013):
 Hi, you broke up with him, so why are you struggling to move on? You made a choice and a right one. Stop worrying about what he is doing and who he sleeps with, its none of your business.
He could also just be good at hiding his feelings as your brother will report back to you how he is doing after the break up. Hence he is behaving happy and partying. And your brother is reporting to you on his progress - that needs to stop, it will not help you move on.
Sometimes we fake happiness and eventually we become happy. Its better to start somewhere than mope around. You need to start seeing other people as friends and stop following up on the ex.
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A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (12 May 2013):
to answer the title:
you can only do this by moving on as much as possible with your life and making yourself happy. he is not worth your time as if he was he would try to win you back. sorry if I sound a bit harsh, I sympathise however as I am going through much the same thing right now :/
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