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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I was with him for a year and a half. I was just 17 when we started dating, he was 21 at the time. He quickly became my first love, and according to him, I became his (I wasn't his first girlfriend, but this was his longest relationship).We shared a lot in common, even had a band together (we both love music and have the same taste). We also liked the same movies, places, we shared our sense of humour, goals, and most views on life... but not all.Our relationship was pure bliss until the sixth months when he asked about my past. He didn't like it. We had issues about it, but managed to cope quite well.Lately, however, he had been getting on my nerves. (Oh, by no means is this our first break up, which I guess makes it harder, since we got back together so many times before, but now I think it's definitive). He had been making more comments about my past (unfortunately he knew and WAS friends with an ex fwb of mine). So it upset me... and on Wednesday, I showed him the door, literally, told him he didn't deserve my love and that I never wanted to see him again... I was deeply hurt, because he had been making hurtful comments about my past and din't realize how it made me feel, so my impulse was to break up with him, I guess to hurt him, to make him realize what he was losing by (mis)treating me like that.We didn't have a word yesterday... but today I just had to at least, say goodbye properly. So I called him and he said he didn't wanna see me after what I had done, that he didn't feel well, but that he was more calm than when he was with me. Still, he agreed to let me talk for ten minutes after work. So I went to see him.I told him I didn't want to end things badly, that I do love him, and apologized for being hard on him the other night. That he's a good person, but I respect it if he doesn't want to be with me. That I had learned a lot from all this, and that this will always be special. That I wished him all the best...He said nothing back... he said a very cold and kinda forced "you too... go pick up your things tomorrow, the faster the better, I don't want to see them" (I have some stuff at his place).He just turned around and left, he made no eye contact during the whole conversation. I felt like he didn't even care about me.How can I cope with all this? He always talked about marriage and kidns, and overcoming all our problems and trying to do all we could to make it happen all the times it was necessary... I mean, I don't expect him to get back together with me, but a kind goodbye would've been nice.Now my mind is plagued with the good memories, also the bad ones, but I just love him so much... I feel those typical feelings that I lost the love of my life, that I'll never love again, and that I never want to be in a relationship again because I don't want to go through all this pain again. Also, I fear he'll move on faster and I'll still be sad...Help?? How can I get over this? How can I just be cool about it like he is, be calm about it, and deal with it well? Here I sit crying...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): hi hunny dont worry in time youl feel better. i find drinking helps just drown your sorrows with a few vodkas or maybee try some pot.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): (I'm the OP)... I've always been a hopeless romantic, and even though it's proved to be very nice on more than a few ocassions, this time, it isn't...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): I mean I was the dumper, I shouldn't feel like this...My heart obviously wants him back, because I love him and all... but my head knew this wouldn't last from a long time... it's just hard to listen to my head more...
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