A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I go to an all boys school, so I dontb see that many girls. Very often, but in my town there is this girl who I think I love, thing is, I have a really low self esteem and I have only ever talked to her once. We barely ever see each other and I think she barely knows I exist but I really love her (i'm pretty mature for my age). I think going to an all boys school has ruined my social skills and I have no idea how to talk to her. Also, Ive got a really low self esteem because at my school, my "friends" are always bullying me and telling me what a loser I am. I try to ignore them but I can't help taking it to heart and believing them. I have a few questions; 1. Do you have any advice on how to actually start a conversation with a girl? And how to continue on after that?2. How can I raise my confidence so speaking to girls is easier; at the moment I can't even approach girls I don't like. :(3. How can I develop a resistence to what the guys at my school say that I don't Take it to heart it doesn't take away from my already non-existent self esteem? Thanks in advance, any help is much appreciated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the answers! I have no idea whether we have anything in common because I have only talked to her once, we don't have any classes together because we go to different schools. I probably only see her twice a year but I really love her and I just can't get her out of my mind! It's even starting to affect my school work, and I'm getting desperate for a way to gain some confidence. No matter how hard I try, I can't seem to make myself feel any better about who I am.
And even though I have nothing to lose, next time I see her I'm afraid I still won't have the guts to talk to her! It is driving me insane!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2009): Do you have much is common, or any hobbies/ school activites or classes together? Find something that you both like talking about and let the conversation flow from there. xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your answer, I think I will just gather my courage next time I see her (could be a while) and talk to her, another question though, what do I talk about after I've said hi? Thanks again for your answer!
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A
male
reader, StudentOfLife  +, writes (11 May 2009):
 I remember having self esteem problem at your age as well. Teenage years is a very confusing time. The only time I truly started to see a change in me, confidence wise, was when I started reading self-growth books.
To it's core, self confidence problem is barely a knowledge problem. Once you know, and practice, how to interact with people, it becomes easy.
If you don't want to read, then I would suggest to go out there and practice talking to girls you don't like.
Leave the one you like for once you're good with talking with people you don't like.
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A
female
reader, Karing Kris  +, writes (11 May 2009):
 You sound perfect to me already!!!
it is difficult i know, but making that huge step to say hello will make a massive difference. Love can never be rushed! When you have said hello a few more times and are feeling slightly more confident maybe invite a friend round who you can trust to meet her and her friend so its not as focused on you and take it easy.
There is not a lot you can do apart from doing it! Just DO IT!!! That's all there is to it for me just say hello! How are you? simple it will soon progress into more i promise you that! As for the boys at your school, they probably feel your an easy target and they feel they get something out of teasing you purely so they cannot be teased about their Insecurities and problems! You are doing the right thing tho. show you are not bothered and when you have something to be proud of boast a little and when one of the main bum heads is not doing so good point it out to the rest of the group good luck x
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