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male
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anonymous
writes: HiI'm a single man(35)and I attended a wedding at the weekend which was a bit of an ordeal. Im single so I didnt have anybody to accompany me which is why it was such a hard experience to go through. I'll be honest and say that it was my first wedding ever (Dont ask, its a long story). But anyway I was a little nervous leading up to the big day, didnt want to feel awkward as I knew there would be a lot of couples there and not too many other single people. But it was actually worse than I imagined. It was such an uncomfortable, awkward experience. There were in total, 4 single guys(3 of which where brothers of the bride) and 2 sngle women there. I was seated at a table with nothing but couples. The guy beside me and his wife were very nice and made an effort to include me in their conversation but inevitably they'd talk amongst themselves and to the other couples which left me sitting in silence on my own for long stretches throughout the meal. And then afterwards all the couples went off to dance with each other when the band came on. I tried to get up and mingle but everytime the couples would end up dancing with each other and I was kind of blocked out of the circle. The 2 single girls I just didnt fancy, so nothing was gonna happen there. Anyway the point is, normally Im ok in my everyday life being single. Weekends can be a bit lonely but I can handle that. But this wedding makes me realise how much on the outside I am. At one stage during the night I overheard one of the guys I know talking in a hallway in the hotel to his girlfriend about me. He's a nice guy and he didnt mean anything bad by what he said but I heard him say something like, "Dave is here on his own.......thank God thats not me, dont know if I could handle that." I felt like a leper after hearing that. Im only realising now how much of a difference having somebody in your life makes. It was really slammed home to me at the wedding. Now it has me a bit worried though. Im 35 and ive been single for 4 years. Im worried about having to attend weddings, social events by myself for the rest of my life. I have no idea how to fix this. All my friends are married now, so I rarely get to see them, which means I dont get to socialse that often. I wouldnt be into internet dating, no offense to anybody who does, its just not my thing. Im already a member of an sports club so I wouldnt have time to join another one due to work. There are no single women in the club, everybody is married or already spoken for(I checked). I guess my question is how do I fix this, how do I meet somebody and make sure the next wedding I attend will actually be an enjoyable experience? Thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2011): Maybe you can join some clubs for singles or other activities to meet new people? You don't mention what your status was before you became single- if you were married or had a gf. Ask your friends and family if they know anyone to fix you up with.What your friend said was really rude- going to a wedding on your own is not the end of the world. There are usually more than a handful of single people at many weddings. You might want to ask a friend to go along with you next time if you don't have a gf by that time. You should have been seated at table with other single people if possible so you didn't feel like a third wheel.Good luck.
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