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He's told others that I'm ''easy''. But was what I did wrong to him, by blocking him and ostracizing him?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Crushes, Dating, Friends with Benefits, Sex, Teenage, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 April 2015) 5 Answers - (Newest, 29 April 2015)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Where do I even start? It all began when I started dating this guy for almost a year and then he dumped me.

He started dating his ex girlfriend and I knew right there what a complete jerk he was. But, when he and his "new ex girlfriend thing" broke up, he started texting me again trying to be "friends."

Things ended up happening and we had sex one time but I immediately told him that it could never happen again and I completely ostracized him from that point on.

Now, I found out that he's still talking about me behind my back telling everyone that I'm "easy" when I know that's not true, I just let feelings get in the way.

I still care about him, but he's just such a manipulative jerk!

And what's worse is I just feel like nobody will have my back on this one because it was my fault for trusting him again.

I blocked him on everything so there is absolutely no contact between us but was I wrong for what happened? Should I really be blamed for this?

View related questions: broke up, ex girlfriend, his ex, text

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A male reader, dougbcoll United States +, writes (29 April 2015):

dougbcoll agony aunt " should i really be blamed for this?" he may be a manipulative jerk, but you did give in to him "was easy".

he got what he was wanting from you, and wants everyone to know it. so yes hes a jerk. using feelings getting in the way not a good excuse, bottom line you gave in.

if a guy can get it easy he will, but you will not be respected for it in his eyes, just his enjoyment "play thing" for that time period. don't expect to build a relationship by giving guys what they want "being easy". they will use you and dump you when they are finished with you.

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A male reader, BrownWolf Canada +, writes (28 April 2015):

BrownWolf agony auntI am going to take this line...re word it using your own words, and see how foolish it sounds...

"I still care about him, but he's just such a manipulative jerk!"

REWORDED...

"he's such a manipulative jerk!But I still care about him."

Does that make sense to you??

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (28 April 2015):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntYou WERE "easy" by putting out for him.....

That said.... forget anything and everything about this creature... He's an immature cad, and NOT for you...

Good luck....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2015):

You're not to blame for anything! We all make mistakes and it all comes down to being a learning experience. He's trouble and his evil nature will backfire on him. He will never get to appreciate a nice girl; he'll always end-up dumped by girls for being a certified jerk. Don't worry, guys like him learn the hard way.

Stay out of his reach. Let him talk, just ignore him. If he's a jerk, he only knows other jerks. So it doesn't matter what he tells them. If you are harassed or bullied in anyway because of him; notify your parents, your school counselor, or the principal. Blocking him, even though you like him, took strength and courage.

Be brave. When he sees he can't get a rise out of you, he'll flake-off like dandruff.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (28 April 2015):

Honeypie agony auntShould you be "blamed"? No.

And unless you AGREE with him, let him talk all the smack he wants, IT DOESN'T"T MAKE IT RIGHT! You can't control what he says about you, you can't control what he thinks or do.

NOW you know 100% that he is a jerkwad and is to be IGNORED.

My guess is... he is UPSET because you didn't want to become his FWB girl on the side. The fact that you regretted sleeping with him might make him feel like you USED him. He got his little ego hurt and now he wants to hurt yours.

You made a mistake in dating this guy, and then in sleeping with him after his break up. IT HAPPENS. All you can do is IGNORE his gossip and him. LEARN from this.

When you look at it... ISN'T he as "easy" as he claim YOU are?

Eh, let it go.

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