A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm completely lost with my feelings at the moment. I'm still madly in love with my ex even though he broke me and betrayed me on more than one occasion. It's been a month now since we split and i felt completely emotionally drained, i didn't even cry over the end of our 4 yr relationship because i was just so exhausted with it. And i've been an emotional brick ever since.He begged for me to come back, assured me he had changed but i didn't want to know. I told him i was never going back and that i didn't believe he'd changed. Only last week i found out more bad news that he was having a fling with a friend of mine when we were going through a difficult patch. I've barely spoken to him since finding this out and even told him i hated him. To mix it up even more i've gotten close to another guy this week and i know he genuinely cares deeply for me. But i've found that the more time i spend with him, the more i think of my ex and how much i want him...want to go back to how things were. I don't even care anymore about what he did to hurt me, all i know is that i still love him. I've realised that i jumped into the arms of another guy far too soon and that i'm just not ready for such attention from anyone. I know that my ex has made plans to leave where we live in a few months time, and i don't want to interfere with those plans. But i just don't know if i should tell him i still love and want him or keep reminding myself of all the hurt he's caused me and how he has turned me into this emotionless creature. I'm just so confused....
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female
reader, Mariela  +, writes (8 April 2009):
 i think you should leave him is the best for the both of you.... my story is similar my boyfriend cheated on me with 2 of my friens and we were together for 4 years and we just broke up month ago and i started talking to another friend who has always liked me or i mean love me for the past 2 years....i started talking to him but he does make me think about my ex too and all the love i have for him.,....but dont make a man your world cuz you might not even be in his so think about and try to move on if possible...
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2009): Darling, I have to say you need time. sigh. I know its hard. I was in love and with a man for 5 years. My best friend. He betrayed me several times, cheated gave me an std. Its been almost a year since I have seen him. And guess what, it still hurts. I'll be out on a date and think of him, wonder what it would be like if I was with him instead.
It gets better. Sometimes I think of him for a split second - maybe Ill even smile - and that will be it. no tears.
I can't tell you whether you should stay with him or not. I mean, I could, but I shouldn't :-P I will say though, that since you said you were confused, you don't know yet. so don't decide yet. If he's been mistreating you, step away for YOU. Its hard, but you will become so much stronger for it. I know it may sound cliche, but cliches are cliches for a reason, right? Love yourself. Spend time with yourself. Reinvent yourself. Feel you feelings. Be sad. Just keep your chin up. And most importantly, Give Yourself Time. Like my mother says to me "Be gentle with yourself".
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