A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:My problem is kinda long but I need advice urgently so please bare with me. Ive got a 6 month old son, me and his dad are not together anymore and havnt been since I was pregnant. However, we got on well apart and he would have our son over at his place every other weekend. This has been the arrangement since our son was 6 weeks old. At first, it used to kill me giving him away for the whole weekend, however I knew that it was important that they developed a bond. My ex would give me maintainence money every mont too. Things were ok. However, things started to annoy me i.e. he used to turn up late and drop our son off late etc. Nothing major but enough to annoy me. When I raised this with him, he accused me of being petty and starting a fight over nothing. I just see it as disrespectful. Then, my ex lost his monile phone about 4 months ago and hasnt bothered to get another one. He lives at home with his parents and expected me to ring their phone every time I needed to contact him. This was fine if my ex wasnt there, but mostly he was at work and I would have to wait til he got home to contact him about anything if I needed to. And also, I wasnt keen on him taking our son out anywhere if he didnt have a phone on him. When I raised this with him, and suggested he get a new phone, again he said I was being petty and kicking off over nothing. Then a couple of weeks ago, my ex said his brother was moving home meaning that my ex would have to move back out into the garden shed (converted into an outhouse sort of thing made of wood but with heating) and that our son would have to stay in there with him when he was to stay with him at the weekends. I said no. Hes only 6 months old the winter is on its way. I dont like the thought of my baby being in the garden overnight even if the thing has got heating. Again,. my ex said I was being silly and petty and arguing over nothing. However, this time I kept to my word and said no. So my ex said that our son could only stay the nights that his brother is not there. I said ok, as no other option really, apart from my ex having our son overnight at my place but he said no. Then tonight, my ex had our baby at his place for a couple of hours. I wanted him to bring him back at a certain time and he said no. Without letting him give me a reason, I just went mad at him and said to him to stop telling me what to do with our son. I then drove over to his parents place to get my son. I was greeted by his dad who had a go at me, saying I was out of order etc etc. Then my ex came up to me, grabbed me, threw me through a door outside and got me against the wall. Then he shouted at me so loud in the street and right in my face. I pushed past him grabbed my son and started to walk towards my ar. My ex was still shouting at me and pointing his finger in my face, in front of our son. Then he said he was going to take me to court. That was the last I heard before driving off.I dont know what to do, I think I have been so leniant with him giving the circumstances. When I was pregnant, he cheated on me and even said that the baby wasnt his. He ignored me for the whole 9 months and didnt help me out once until the end when he bought me a pram cos I was totally skint. I have let him see his son whenever he wants and even let him stay over at weekends when it was so hard for me to let my baby go. I cant believe how violent he was towards me when all I want him to do is respect the fact that Im his mother, the primary carer, and that he cant just go off and do what he feels like with our son. What should I do now?
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at work, cheated on me, lives at home, money, my ex, violent Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2010): You best bet is to contact a lawer before he has the chance to and tell the lawyer all the information regarding your ex. Also in when he grabbed you if there is mark there, it would be best to contact the police and get a picture of it so that the lawyer could use that for evidence becuase if he's willing to hurt you he will eventually be willing to hurt your child.
A lawyer can help you out my mother had the same with her first marrige, he was like that and she took him to court made it so she had the say if they he was aloud to meet his son and daughter and have to pay monthly maintence bassed on how much he earned.
It's the safe choice and will protect your child.
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