A
female
age
30-35,
*o_in_love
writes: Theres this guy I really like that I work with.. He has a bit of a reputation as a slut and for some stupid reason I've slept with him.. Twice. For me, this has just made me like him even more and I don't really know what to do anymore. He's made it clear he doesn't think of me in that way. A few weeks ago a load of people from work were out and I got too drunk, he got into one of my mates and I threw my drink on her and he saw. This is not like me, I'd never do anything like that, ever. Now he ignores me and when I'm drunk he makes sure he steers clear. I don't blame him, but everytime I see him my heart races and my mind goes blank. I see him at least once a week and its really starting to hurt now.Please help.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2008): I think you've got to take this one as a lesson learned.
Clearly sleeping with someone breeds attachment for you, as it does for a lot of normal women. But it doesn't only happen with guys and situations where it's convenient for you to get attached.
You had sex with him of your own volition. You already even knew he was a slut at the time. It's not his problem that you can't handle it now.
I think the only thing you can do is stay away from him as best you can. If you find yourself dwelling on him, try to force yourself to remember that the hookup didn't mean anything to him and he is already hooking up with others. No matter how much it hurts, don't avoid these facts in your mind. Nature gives us pain over things in order to teach us not to make that mistake again.
Move on to other guys. You obviously want to sleep with a BF who cares about you and it means something to him too. So do that next time.
A
female
reader, brooke5426 +, writes (27 April 2008):
I think its YOU who should be avoiding HIM. 99% of the time, people get reputations for a reason. He's a slut. And he had sex with you even though he "doesnt think of you in that way". Sad little boy.
You dont wanna be with a guy like that, you couldnt trust him as far as you could throw him, and hes obviously not very nice and just uses people to get his own way.
You like him because he's made it clear you can't have him. Its just human nature but nothing good is gonna come out of it so you have to start making moves towards forgetting about him. Avoid him as much as you can, in the cases where you really cant avoid being near him, dont acknowledge him and start looking around you cos i bet there are a lot of really nice, hot guys who would treat you right.
take care
Brooke
xxx
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