A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I've been in so much pain from this relationship, from fighting and him not having enough time for me it's been rough. I talked to him about it, he said it's not his fault he's always busy and doesn't have time. I understand that but I told him "then maybe you're too busy to have a girlfriend"? We talked about it for a while and I don't even know if we're together, broken up, or on a break. I suggested a break so he can get things together and if things work out then we can go back to normal.. but it was pretty much like we broke up because I was like you don't have time for me. I know he likes me a lot.. and I feel like I love him, but it's just soo hard. I cry a lot over him because I just wanna be with him a lot and it just hurts.. It seems like he's with his friends more than me too and it seems to not bother him that we don't see each other a lot. He says it's not his fault.. then why should we stay together and have me feeling like crap every day? I just don't know what to do at this point. I love him so much and I don't want to lose him but maybe it's the right thing to do.. What do you think? Help is appreciated thanks.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you guys so much.. it means a lot. so he texted me about an hour ago and said what happened last night. i was like what do you mean. and he goes "you broke up with me when i was high?" i was like what ever when are you ever not high and he was like whatever fuck you goodbye and i was like "whatever i can never be serious with you.." so i guess thats that.. i'm not going to talk to him i'll let him talk to me if he wants.. but thanks so much. :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2009): If he is spending more time with his friends than with you that's definitely not a good thing in my opinion. From the way you said it, it sounds like his friends and social life are more important than his relationship with you. The only time I've ever been that way in a relationship was when I was trying to figure out if I really wanted to be in a relationship that was making me unhappy. At the time my ex and I spent a lot of time fighting and when we weren't fighting generally were off with our own groups of friends and didn't see much of each other until I finally admitted that I didn't have the same feelings that I thought I had for her when we first started going out. If it was just that he was busy with work making sure he could pay bills and stuff like that I would say cut him some slack but if you aren't the most important person for him to spend his time with outside of work with then it's not really fair to yourself to spend all your time waiting around for him and spending the time you do have together fighting about it. Also I don't know if most guys are like me but when I can't spend time with my girlfriend it really bothers me and it seems odd to me that he would be totally fine with not seeing you. But basically I would say if the relationship isn't making you happy then what's the point of being in it? Granted I may not know everything that is going on but that's my opinion based on what I've read and how I approach relationships.
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A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (7 January 2009):
 You both are very young, mabey he's affriad at what happens when hes with you.
It sounds like you broke it off. i wouldn't call him for a while wait for him to call you because he will be asking the same questions. in fact move on all together, i know its not what you wanna hear but if he sees that you have he will wonder why, and he will most likely call.
Also if you do this and you find another guy to be with then you will be much happier, why bother stressing about a guy who can't give a proper reason nor make a real effort to be with you?
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