A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hey everyoneMe and my BF broke up about 4 months ago. I had no idea why. He just came one day and said, he wants to be single and he needs to focuse on himself. I was absolutely devastated. Our relationship was great as well as sex. I loved him and I know he loved me very much.He went to Europe for about a week and he came back totaly different. The thing is, his family is different religion than I am and i guess its very important to them, that their only son will date somenone w the same religion.He didn't care (as he said) and dated all kinda girls. We had plans and such and all the sudden after 7days of vocation he breaks up w me. Nobody knew why. His friends said, that he is acomplete different person and that they dont even hang out anymore.Truth was, he got hooked w a girl of his religion back in Europe (she lives somewhere here in US - about 5 hours away from where we are) ... he didnt tell me ... i found out myself. I don't understand why didnt he just tell me. I met up with him couple weeks later to give him stuff, and I asked if it was cause of someone else, he said absolutely not. He never lied to me, and I just cant understand why would he do this. People that knowh im said that he is not happy but that he doesntwant to talk about me or hear my name and thats thatI never have done anything to him .. and I just dont know what happenedEveryone thinks it was a family press. they knew we wanna get married, and I guess it wasnt good news to them...Whwat do you guys think?
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female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (2 January 2009):
I am sorry for your pain. Love has two main ingredients, people and timing. If the two are not working together then the romance will fail. I think this is a case of poor timing. Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do about it.
If it is family pressure, it still is timing. He has doubts and concerns that may have been brought to him by his family. He is reconcilling things in his head. You need to let him do this. It will solidify for him what he is looking for in a mate.
We all go through phases where we are more introspective. When we are with someone, it is really hard to take time to know yourself.
Give him his space and move on with your life. He may or may not come back into your life but you should not wait for that to happen. Use this time to make yourself stronger too. What did you like about the relationship and what would you do differently. Learn from this and move forward. That really is all you can do.
I am sorry for your pain.
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